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VirtualCapital2838
|
2022-10-23 16:03:27
| 1,666,541,007 | null |
['matches', 'OLD']
| 0 |
yblfwe
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 33 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/yblfwe/are_my_standards_too_high_25m_never_been_in_a/
| 19 |
About me: Currently in law school and I work part time at Starbucks. I workout and have the build of a soccer player and I do charity work on the side. Im also 5’6 which doesn’t really bother me. My primary way of meeting girls is through OLD and while I do get my fair share of matches, I’ve only gotten one date out of it. My friends describe me as confident, kind well dressed, well groomed, nice eyes, always smelling nice, smart, funny and pure with my intentions in that I don’t look like I’m after sex in a relationship. (Let me be clear ik this is the bare minimum and I don’t expect a relationship just for being kind). I’ve only been on one date and I ended it after that because she was such a judgmental and awful human being (among other things, she looked at me with disgust when I told her where I work despite knowing that I’m in the top law school in my country). I’ve also asked a friend out who agreed to a date but flaked on me (my first heartbreak 😅) What I look for in a girl: Is she kind, confident, smart (no that doesn’t mean she needs to have a degree), ambitious and am I physically attracted to her. It’s the last thing that might be the most restrictive. Im not looking for a supermodel but I need some level of physical attraction. Thoughts? Edit: While I don’t believe in leagues, others might and I wonder if I’m aiming way too high above it.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Are my standards too high? 25M Never been in a relationship
| null | 0.83 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/yblfwe/are_my_standards_too_high_25m_never_been_in_a/
|
Slow_Frosting_9227
|
2024-05-11 14:00:28
| 1,715,436,028 | 0 |
['tinder']
| 0 |
1cpi56l
| true | null | 4 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1cpi56l/stuck_in_a_relationship_and_i_dont_know_what_to_do/
| 1 |
Hi r/dating_advice I (26M) need an advice on how to manage my relationship. Communication doesn't work as I thought because every time I try to express my needs it gets in a spiral where it ends in me saying sorry. I'm in a relationship with a girl (22F) which I met on Tinder. We got in a relationship a little bit to fast jumping some steps. I was shocked when she told me now we are in a relationship just because we kissed. I told my therapist I don't know what to do and I wasn't searching for a relationship at that point because of a bad break-up in December. Long story short: Now we are in a relationship since 1st of March. She moved at my place a month ago and we stay togheter. I miss going out with friends, playing some games or talking with my friends on Discord. She said this is imature and doesn't like that. She said now that we are in a relationship we are doing everything together. Every time I leave her alone she gets needy and she keeps sending me messages. One example is when I went home for Easter Holiday and I was in need for personal space to stay with my family. All four days I was home I was with my phone in my hand and talking with her because she was sending me messages over and over again even if I told her I need to help my family or I was doing something else. When she needs personal space I need to leave her alone but when I need it she gets angry and she think I'm leaving her, I'm bored of her. Even last night she told me she is scared that she is too needy and to much for me and I had to reasure her it's not like that. I don't know what to do. I'm scared about the fact that if I will bring the break-up part I will start a storm. P.s. : She is love bombing me as well. P.s.s: Since we started the relationship we didn't had sex at all. She said we will have sex when she will feel I will be her husband. Even if that means one year, two years. She said I will have to wait and she doesn't like my history about my intimate relationships.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Stuck in a relationship and I don't know what to do
| 1 | 0.67 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1cpi56l/stuck_in_a_relationship_and_i_dont_know_what_to_do/
|
Sea-Artist1154
|
2024-01-22 05:01:31
| 1,705,899,691 | 0 |
['bumble', 'hinge']
| 0 |
19cntgw
| true | null | 3 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/19cntgw/how_to_vet_a_match_on_hinge_when_hinge_has/
| 1 |
Pretty much what the title says. My match requested in-person date and I told him I would like to have a video call first. But then I noticed Hinge doesn't have that feature anymore. Due to safety reasons, I don't want to take this off Hinge either because we have only been chatting for a few days. So, I am not comfortable giving him my insta for the video chat. How else can I vet him before meeting in-person? Ugh Bumble is better in this regard, at least it has vid call and audio call feature. What do the rest of u do to vet the guy before meeting him in person when u match on Hinge?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
How to vet a match on Hinge when Hinge has removed video call feature?
| 1 | 0.67 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/19cntgw/how_to_vet_a_match_on_hinge_when_hinge_has/
|
bomb_atomically
|
2020-02-11 04:20:22
| 1,581,394,822 | null |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
f22zoz
| true | null | 53 | 0 |
/r/datingoverthirty/comments/f22zoz/i_did_it_dot_i_erased_all_the_dating_apps_on_my/
| 65 |
TLDR: Met a girl who made me rethink about life and the direction I was going in. Thanks to her and this sub, I realized the world will not wait for me or feel sorry for me, and I have to work on myself first before I can take the next step. I (M29) went out with a girl (F24), let’s call her Samantha, and it was one of the worst first dates I’ve ever experienced. Before we met, it was great. We hit it off chatting on an app, exchanged numbers, and set up a date. I was worried I set the date too far ahead, thinking we would run out of topics to talk about while texting, but conversation flowed naturally, and I genuinely enjoyed talking to her. (Before we continue, there are some things you should know. I still live at home in the basement. I have a master's degree and I have job that pays decently at an institution I really admire) We texted about a week before meeting and everything was going smoothly, but I do remember two instances where there was a blip. The first was when she asked what I did. I told her I was a technician. She said she was a consultant. We continued talking and I’m sure she did not care what I did, and even if she did it did not matter, because I hated myself at that point. I hated the fact that I was working in a position that did not have a future. I have no passion for it, and it has nothing to do with my degree. I also was, for a lack of a better word, jealous of what she did. It seemed like she was ahead of me in life (she was) and I was spiraling hard. I should've stopped talking to her then, but no, I slept on it and continued texting like nothing was wrong. The second instance was when she texted that she was ‘very excited to get to know me better’ as we got close to the date. And instead of feeling elated, I felt scared. Worried. She didn’t know I still lived with my parents. That I hated my job. But I ignored all that and told her I felt the same. Fake it till you make it right? Wrong. While waiting for her at the bar we were supposed to meet, I realized I never felt this before. I was nervous, and not the nice butterflies in the stomach, but instead ‘waiting on the dentist’s chair’ nervous. My confidence was just not there, and it was scary, mainly because I never felt that before. My ‘switch’ was just not turning on. Well she came in, sat down and we started talking and conversation was okay. Thinking back, I realized in the beginning she asked a lot of questions about me. We were getting to know each other and the vibes were really good. We both started opening up and it was great. I was slowly letting hope creep back in. But then the question I was dreading the whole night finally came up. “I moved here recently but I’m loving it so far So…do you live with roommates?” “No, still at home. Just finished school and recently starting working so I’m trying to save up. I’m planning to move out by next year.” Even as those words came out I knew I messed up. I didn’t believe those words at all, so how could she? I tried talking about my job and why I chose to do it but the damage was done. She got a bit distant. Conversation was still flowing but not as many follow up questions to try to get to know me. We got some food and it looked like things were going okay, but she was the first one to ask for the check. Before the mood shift, I told her I wanted to take her to this gelato shop in the area. She was very enthusiastic when I first brought it up and she was polite enough to stick to the plan. We walked to the gelato shop and I still thought I had a chance to save the date. I was wrong. I was missing all my jokes, I could not really flirt, and towards the end, everything I said sounded like a pathetic ploy to keep her around longer. Just flinging crap on the wall hoping something would stick. Finally, she said she wanted to turn in early for work tomorrow. We gave each other a very quick hug, I gave her a weak ‘I’ll talk to you soon’ and I told her to let me know when she got home. I knew it was over but it still hurt when she didn’t message me that she go home safely. When I didn’t hear from her a couple of hours later, I sent my last hail mary: ‘Hey I had a great time tonight (lie). I hope you got home safe and I hope we see each other soon’. No answer and I went to sleep, or at least tried to. How could it go so bad? The corny emojis, the excitement, it just disappeared in a matter of hours. The next day (today) she messaged back ‘Hey thanks Sorry I forgot to respond. I had a great time with you as well Hope you have a great week!’. And I was devastated. I was just going through the motions at work, trying to find more things to do so I could get my mind off of her and the date. I also started thinking about other girls I've really liked and when things fizzled out. And there was one common denominator. I still lived with my parents. I remember reading articles and talking to my close friends. I was never happy about the fact I lived with my parents but they all told me that I was just setting myself up for failure. Stop focusing on the negatives, but instead focus on what you can bring to the table. Don't worry too much about living with the parents. Everyone's circumstances are different. And I ignorantly listened, using dating apps without stop for almost 5 years straight. Going on plenty of dates and wondering why nothing ever lasted. That is why I just wanted to say thank you DOT. This sub was a smack to my face. The comments were blunt. At my age, I should not be at home living with parents. Reading deeper into the comments, I saw why it's so important. It can show a potential significant other so much without me having to say anything. I am going to move out by 2021, just like how I told Samantha, but now I believe in it. That is my goal, my objective. I will read this everyday. I never gave myself a chance to actually grow by myself. I always depended on family, friends, dates, and I feel that stunted my growth. I am still hesitant (happens when you tread your whole life) but I like this excitement, this nervousness. I will enjoy this process thoroughly and hopefully it will be a great year. So yeah, I erased all my dating apps today. I want to take away distractions and focus on myself. Build back up the love I have for myself. Become who I want to be. And hopefully there will be an update to this post (if it doesn't get deleted) exactly one year from now, saying 'Hey, I made it'. Edit: one thing I didn’t mention, I want to move out. I love my parents to death but I’m at the point in my life I want to have my own personal space. I don’t know if this makes sense but I feel like I grew out of living with my parents.
|
datingoverthirty
|
t5_34cyw
|
I did it DOT I erased all the dating apps on my phone
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/f22zoz/i_did_it_dot_i_erased_all_the_dating_apps_on_my/
|
DriedPilot
|
2017-05-23 03:55:26
| 1,495,511,726 | null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0 |
6csbtc
| null | null | 16 | null |
/r/dating_advice/comments/6csbtc/tinder_date_need_advice/
| 4 |
So I matched with this girl on tinder [F,19] and she asked me [M,21] out for drinks, but I am worried about her appearance. I sound shallow, but I realize that if she isn't my type, I don't want to waste her time and mine on a date if she is a little too curvy for me. Her pictures are always close up of the face and I am worried since no body pictures. Should I risk going and then just stand her up if I see she isn't to my liking? Should I just ask her her weight lol. What to do?!
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Tinder Date - Need Advice
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/6csbtc/tinder_date_need_advice/
|
OneRepulsive3756
|
2024-05-24 01:21:00
| 1,716,513,660 | 0 |
['dating app', 'tinder', 'bumble', 'hinge']
| 0 |
1cz93c8
| true |
Question ❓
| 31 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/1cz93c8/what_to_use/
| 2 |
I’m 30 years and feel pretty accomplished…great paying job, have a house, a dog, emotionally stable, financially independent. There isn’t much I need at this point. After talking to my therapist I told him I’m happy but feel like I’m missing on some joy. We determined I’m missing someone else in my life. I agree with him. I’ve been on hinge, bumble, match, and tinder. I think I’m ready to put some money into dating what dating app or service would someone recommend. I was thinking either the league or tawify. Are those good or any other people recommend?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
What to use
| 2 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1cz93c8/what_to_use/
|
Thesurveyoer
|
2019-05-19 01:53:51
| 1,558,230,831 | null |
['matches', 'tinder']
| 0 |
bqbmrc
| true | null | 4 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/bqbmrc/do_people_even_go_on_dates_anymore/
| 3 |
I \[19m\] am getting so frustrated with 'modern dating'. I don't know if there is something wrong with me or what, but I haven't been able to get a date in over a year(since getting out of High School). I feel like I know how to talk to girls and flirt, I actively use Tinder, and I have confidence and self respect, but girls that I've talked to just lose interest as soon as meeting up is brought up. In real life girls aren't hesitant to give out a snapchat, and are usually fine with snapping back and forth here and there, but as soon as you bring up hanging out in person there's a million excuses. On Tinder I've been able to get plenty of matches, which have lead to snapchat's and phone numbers, but the best way(I've found) to get ghosted is to ask to meet up. I guess all I'm asking is has this been anyone else's experience?, because I honestly don't know how to 'hang out' or do whatever it is we call dating nowadays..
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Do people even go on dates anymore?!
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/bqbmrc/do_people_even_go_on_dates_anymore/
|
zevb3k
|
2018-07-22 20:41:42
| 1,532,292,102 | null |
['tinder']
| 0 |
910v0h
| true | null | 5 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/910v0h/mixed_signals_how_should_i_approach_it/
| 1 |
I met this fellow on tinder. (Only my second tinder date and dont think I'll be using that site again) BUT I am into this last guy I met from there. We have many common interests that are not so common. We are both 28 and we are both parents to a little one. His 2, mine 4. Both boys. Apologies if this seems long, I'll try to only put what I find to be relevant details. Our first date he made me food (picnic in a park) and then we went for a hike since the picnic went well. Background on him. He is a full time dad of the 2 year old, full time work and has 2 acres of garden with no irrigation. He is a VERY busy man, which I'm okay with as I like to keep myself busy with my own things. After the first date, we have not hung out during the day, only at his house after the little one goes to bed. He will text most days and will call sometimes. About 2 months in I am over at his house and he seems super distant and did not want to have sex. I told him he seemed distant and he vented to me about some very legitimate stresses going on in his life, so I offered to help relieve some of the stress by cleaning his house. I came over the next day to clean while he was supposed to be gone. (He knew I'd be there cleaning while he was gone) so I cleaned and he ended up coming home later in the evening as his plans got canceled. This is the first day I met his kid. I ended up playing with his kid for an hour while he watered his garden. He then put kid to bed and never came back out of the room. He fell asleep. I wasn't even supposed to see him that night anyways but the next morning he texted to apologize. I was understanding. No big deal. Shit happens. I paint and in the begining, he asked if I'd make him a painting. I did. I LOVE gifting out my paintings more than selling and have gifted away many, this was the first time I did so for a lover. After this night we made plans for me to come over. I called in the evening to see if we were still on and he said yes, he'd call when his son was in bed. However, he never called and instead fell asleep. This time I was a little disheartened, which I told him via text. He didnt write me or call after that night or after my text so I waited a few days and texted him basically saying that it seemed like he needed space and that he was being distant and that I was gonna pull away slightly to offer him that space if that's what he wanted. Still nothing, so I thought that was it then, time to move on so I went back on tinder, and there he was. (We had both previously deleted our accounts). So i deleted it again and wont be back on for many reasons, that just being one. But it was hurtful and confusing, but it's the beginning hadn't discussed being exclusive, so fair enough. About a week after he failed to communicate with me, he texted saying he was sorry for not talking and that he wanted to chat but hated texting and was going through a hard time and was trying to pull himself out and finally thanked me for the painting I had made him saying how much he loves it. (I had put a letter with it, not a love letter but more of a why I chose that painting for him to have, it was sentimental) no mention of the letter. So i asked him when he wanted to talk. This took him almost another week to respond to and he sent another message, almost just like the last one. "Sorry I haven't talked with you, love the painting, hit a rough patch but coming out of it" (essentially). I wrote back nothing but "super pleased". He then went on to say he wanted to talk to me and tried to make a date at this point, so he did and then started calling me again and texting to see what was up. I figured I would hear him out and agreed to a date. I came over earlier in the day this time before his kid went to bed. Date was making a nice dinner that would take a couple hours and finishing up with chores around the house, so I spent the majority of time with his kid instead of him. His kid and I get a long very, very well. Before dinner he says his friend (who is also his new roommate whom I had yet to meet) had planned on watching the big lebowski that night and that he'd forgotten he agreed to that and asked me to stay to watch with them. So we all ate dinner together. He put kid to bed and then we watched the movie. My date decided to sit on the recliner while roommate and I sat on the couch. And since his son had been present there was no intimacy of any kind. After the movie the roommate went to bed. My date was acting as if those few weeks of lack of communication to me never happened and went right into touching and kissing me for the first time that day. It was really late at this point and we were both tired but I went with his advances. I'm human, I do like the guy and intimacy and sex are both nice. But that was it. His roomie went to bed, then immediately after was sex. No "chatting". After sleeping together, it was much too late and he went to bed and I went home. His kiss goodbye was not how he had usually kissed me goodbye, it was more of a minorly prolonged peck kiss. We've been seeing each other for about 3 1/2 months. So, he said he had wanted to chat and we have not, nor do I know what he wanted to talk about or if he was just saying that. But I've never had such mixed signals before. Making me nice meals, sending me home with veggies from his garden, letting me walk into his house without knocking, letting me in his house when he is not even there, the big one's being introducing me to his son so early on and trusting me to be around his kid without him being very present. when we were first hanging out he said he preferred monogamy. On the other side hes on tinder still, hes lacking communication, hes made no mention of just disappearing momentarily since apologizing or having a conversation that he had supposedly wanted to have, and the only time we've had privately together was just having sex since after not having seen him or heard much from him. Obviously I am feeling insecure not knowing where he wants this to go or what his intentions are. But I'm not sure how to approach opening up a dialogue, or when would be an appropriate time, or if I even should try to, or if this seems like too many red flags? I try to put myself in another's shoes and i believe in giving chances and with his situation i did/do not mind having patience, but where do I draw the line? Fuck, this is so long.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Mixed signals, how should I approach it?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/910v0h/mixed_signals_how_should_i_approach_it/
|
Jolly-Rub-3412
|
2023-09-08 20:58:02
| 1,694,206,682 | 0 |
['dating app', 'tinder']
| 0 |
16dlzyz
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/16dlzyz/help_me_analyze_what_went_wrong_or_just_listen_to/
| 1 |
I don’t have a lot of friends or close confidants so thought I’ll share here. Met this guy (24) on a dating app (Tinder) in March. We instantly clicked and started going on dates twice-thrice a week. We officially started dating in June. We did all the"couply" things including meeting each other's friends, meeting his sister, showed me his childhood photos, started telling everyone I was his girlfriend even before we became official. etc. The only catch was that he was leaving the city we live in for his first job ever at the end of June. I was hesitant to do a long distance but he convinced me that we will be fine and I quote "I want to see you and only you". This was his first relationship and we never slept together (he was a virgin and I did not want to pressure him). I tried my best to be as supportive as possible during this transition to the new city (his first time leaving home!) . Everything seemed to be going great. He would FaceTime me daily. I even visited him once. He returned to town in August for a crucial meeting but showed little interest in meeting me. When I expressed my feelings, he had a breakdown and suddenly wanted to see me urgently. He confessed that I liked him more than he could reciprocate and felt uncomfortable sharing his bed with me during my visit. He admitted this wasn't a long-term relationship and got into it due to FOMO, as it was his first relationship. I was shocked and begged him to stay, but I feel foolish now. I feel hurt, angry, and betrayed, having invested everything into this relationship. All I am left is with so many questions. I don't think I got the closure I wanted. Why did he show so much interest in the beginning? If a guy says he doesn’t want a relationship do it meas that he doesn’t want a relationship with ME? Did the relationship overwhelm him? He started acted odly the within a few days after we became "official". And how in the world would you date someone just cause you had FOMO. Some times I wonder it was a fetish thing cause we were from different countries and he seemed oddly obsessed with my culture. Or was he just immature to handle a relationship? It was literally like just when I got fully committed, he decided it was too much for him. Would appreciate any views on this? I am so confused right now. It has been a month and I am still not over it. &x200B;
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Help me analyze what went wrong? Or just listen to my rant. I am beyond confused.
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/16dlzyz/help_me_analyze_what_went_wrong_or_just_listen_to/
|
cholerexsammy
|
2024-07-13 06:15:45
| 1,720,851,345 | 0 | null | 0 |
1e23gcs
| true | null | 6 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/1e23gcs/advice_please_brains_trust/
| 4 |
I met a boy through an app - messaged, spoke on the phone and had two dates. He is the nicest chap, puts in effort for the dates - which I’ve never had before, easy to talk too and we have so much in common but I feel absolutely nothing - nada, zip nothing - how do I let him know without hurting his feelings that nothing will happen? He is definitely into me but I don’t see it moving past a friendship?
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
Advice please brains trust
| 4 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/1e23gcs/advice_please_brains_trust/
|
Bluemugredmug
|
2023-11-05 00:34:55
| 1,699,144,495 | 0 |
['matched']
| 0 |
17o0017
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/17o0017/should_i_tell_him_not_to_come/
| 1 |
Hey gang, 32F, matched with a 32M while I was in Paris recently. Incredibly, impossibly, we hit it off immediately and fell into what felt a bit like love - in fact, he told me he was very into me which was a big deal for him, has had limited female partners etc. Two days later I had to travel to Spain and we decided he would come and see me three weeks later, when I had a week off (I paid for his ticket over. It was a substantial amount of money, but evened out for things he had bought etc). Fast forward 2 weeks and we're talking less and less. It feels awkward. I've asked him about it a bit, and we've managed to discuss things openly but I feel like the quality of our discussions is going down hill. He'll still leave me voice messages which are sweet, and text first in the morning, but he'll often be online on whatsapp, but takes time to get to our chat, and he is slower to respond in general. I have wondered whether he is talking to other women, which I guess is fully within his right; I've spoken to the odd dude but he has remained my first choice regardless. Now I'm stuck - I don't particularly want a dude staying with me if it's going to be awkward/ he isn't feeling it...but I'm not getting my money back and I feel like I almost don't have the right to ask him about it or have any more discussions about 'us' on the basis of two days together... but I'm also kind of annoyed and suck at just shrugging stuff like this off. What do I do?? TL;DR met a guy, he's coming to see me, texting is getting shit, not sure if I should point out the evolving situation and tell him not to come or just let him come and see.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Should I tell him not to come?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/17o0017/should_i_tell_him_not_to_come/
|
Already_Deleted_Once
|
2016-02-28 04:34:06
| 1,456,634,046 | 0 |
['tinder']
| 0 |
4806ll
| null | null | 3 | null |
/r/dating_advice/comments/4806ll/when_to_start_casually_kissing/
| 3 |
I [21M] just started seeing this girl I met on Tinder whose the same age. Our first date was great, good, long conversation and I gave her a peck on the cheek at the end but that was it. Our second date was last night and we went to see a show at a local bar. At the end of the date we kissed, it was great and we both definitely were into each other. We texted today a couple times and she suggested we get brunch tomorrow morning which I thought was great because I've been wanting to see her all day. Now my last real relationship was years ago, and that was a highschool relationship where we never really went through a real dating phase. As an adult, how do you act with someone after the first kiss has already happened? Should you greet them with a kiss, or just have another goodbye kiss? My plan is to just go with the flow as I think I'll be able to read her body language, I'm just curious what other girls usually expect.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
When to start casually kissing?
| 3 | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/4806ll/when_to_start_casually_kissing/
|
luddface
|
2023-07-19 09:19:28
| 1,689,758,368 | 0 |
['online dating']
| 0 |
153pw4m
| false | null | 4 | 0 |
/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/153pw4m/hi_i_am_a_man_who_has_been_lurking_this_sub_for/
| 1 |
So, my questions are: 1. I have the last couple of years only seem to have found emotionally unavailable women. Every time I meet someone I get emotionally invested with, I always get the excuse that they are not ready for a relationship right now, or something of the sort. I am very open in my emotional communication, and can develop feelings quite easily. I thought openness and emotional availability would increase chances of finding a partner. But I get the feeling that I'm scaring women away by doing this. But I really don't feel like playing games. How should I think in regards to this? 2. I have mostly dated through online dating, and been somewhat successfully so far. But it takes a lot of work and energy, which I don't have. I wish I could meet girls spontaneously. But since I have heard so many horror stories here and from women friends, I am scared to approach. I am in general bad in striking up conversations with strangers. How and where should I approach women to make them feel comfortable and want to talk to me? &x200B; Thank you!
|
TwoXChromosomes
|
t5_2r2jt
|
Hi! I am a man who has been lurking this sub for quite some time. This sub is one of the reasons I have become a feminist and changed my view on women (which growing up was problematic). I now have two questions for women here about dating.
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/153pw4m/hi_i_am_a_man_who_has_been_lurking_this_sub_for/
|
HotCatLady88
|
2023-03-10 13:35:00
| 1,678,455,300 | null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0 |
11npdob
| true | null | 4 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/11npdob/catfish_or_not/
| 1 |
Matched with a guy on tinder and have been texting for over a week now. No efforts to meet in person yet and every time I suggest to meet he is cagey. Today I texted him if he has plans Saturday and if he is free we should meet. He goes about how he will be going to Turkey to help rebuild with his friends…..??ok cool but when are you back? …he doesn’t know . Ok
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Catfish or not?
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/11npdob/catfish_or_not/
|
throwawaymoleee
|
2019-07-18 19:31:28
| 1,563,478,288 | null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0 |
cex1zi
| true | null | 5 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/cex1zi/girl_just_stopped_messaging_and_its_eating_my_soul/
| 1 |
So I matched with this girl on tinder 5 days ago and we really hit it off from the beginning. When the tinder conversation started we talked for like 2 hours straight with one message every 5 seconds. The next day we talked on snap as well for 2 hours straight without pause, 1 snap every 10 seconds. She is really awesome, funny and great at conversations - I feel like I really like her lol.. I've tried to talk to her for the past 3 days but she seems uninterested now for some reason, even though she said I was really cool and handsome etc - I've wanted to shoot her a message but I've been told im too clingy so I try to avoid that. So can someone tell me what the hell happened? I don't think I'm unattractive or anything but everything just stopped and its eating my soul for some reason. My guess is that she just found a better guy or something but idk we hit it off really well so this is so fucking bizarre...... Do I just wait and see if she initiates conversation or should I be the "clingy" one and keep trying?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Girl just stopped messaging and its eating my soul
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/cex1zi/girl_just_stopped_messaging_and_its_eating_my_soul/
|
DABIGGESTBOSS4623
|
2019-07-11 17:36:13
| 1,562,866,573 | null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0 |
cbylgo
| true | null | 2 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/cbylgo/worried_im_annoying/
| 2 |
I(20m) matched with thos woman on tinder and we have mostly just been texting. I asked her out for this weekend, but she said she'd need to see as her father's birthday is coming up and she wants to see if they're doing anything. So we have mostly been texting and I usually text back immediately if I can, but I feel like maybe I'm just annoying her and should leave it alone, because sometimes after a long conversation she'll respond with just lol. I've just been leaving it alone for the day and don't want to bug her. Am I right?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Worried I'm annoying
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/cbylgo/worried_im_annoying/
|
thedude88889
|
2016-10-12 00:41:43
| 1,476,232,903 | 0 |
['online dating']
| 0 |
571fls
| null | null | 6 | null |
/r/dating_advice/comments/571fls/what_kind_of_a_person_am_i_right_for/
| 1 |
I'm a 27 year old male, very average/plain looking, good job and education, lean and 6'0 tall. I've never had a gf and never had any girls interested in me. I really, really want a gf/companionship but it seems impossible, quite literally. I'm a little shy but i have a normal personality. I'm just not super funny or super interesting. I've tried getting with girls before, but there is very little interest. I've tried online dating and it hasn't been a success either. That's after going on dates with a few women (who 1) weren't that attractive and 2) told me there's either no chemistry, or don't have any feelings for me, so let's assume they didn't find me attractive even if my personality is fine). With that said, I have no idea who's right for me. Anyone I find attractive is out of my league by definition. I've tried dating someone i don't find attractive, and kissing them felt like i was kissing cardboard, so i don't know if dating people without chemistry is a good idea. I just don't know what to do at this point. On the one hand i'm tired of trying and i'm happier not looking at all because at least i don't get massively disappointed every time i try, on the other hand i'm so sick of being lonely it eats me inside, and i feel like crying every time i go in public and see couples, and what would my life be like when i don't have any sex, spend any time with my partner, always go to sleep alone, every time i go to parties i'm the only single one, always alone on valentines day, never kiss someone on new years etc. i can't imagine living a life like that, but at the same time i'm at the point of giving up with girls because at this point it's not a numbers game for me anymore, but a 100% chance of getting shot down every time. I thought a lot about this, and i figured the only way to find a girlfriend is to be 1) in some sort of demand and 2) to have options. That way i'd have confidence to tell a girl " I don't need you" if she starts being disrespectful (that way i protect my self esteem, confidence and feelings), and also i'd be able to pick the best of the options i have, rather than beg someone for attention. This way I will also have confidence in myself and the ability to be myself without trying too hard to be interesting or funny, thus acting naturally without fear that she will pick the next guy that shows interest in her. But i have no idea how to get to that point. I'm too average looking to improve my looks, too introverted to be the life of the party and even though i make good money i'm never going to be a milli/billionaire. what are your guys thoughts about all this?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
What kind of a person am I right for?
| 1 | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/571fls/what_kind_of_a_person_am_i_right_for/
|
mamaphoenix86
|
2024-03-07 17:59:57
| 1,709,834,397 | 0 |
['hinge']
| 0 |
1b913fw
| true | null | 13 | 0 |
/r/datingoverfifty/comments/1b913fw/why_do_men_not_like_condoms/
| 3 |
I, 37 F met a man, 52 on Hinge two weeks ago. Went out for a dinner and he invited me over to his after because he didn't want me driving under the influence home. The next morning, he wanted sex and I said no. He even joked that a blowjob doesn't count as sex, but I countered it by telling him if it would count if we continued dating and I did it to one of his friends. His answer was a very quick no. He asked me to join him and his friends on a night out soon after. He stayed over at mine and I insisted he wear a condom.. He obliged, but complained that he had to wear one because he hasn't done so in years. I managed to get condoms from one of his friend's girlfriends because I didn't trust him enough to get and I wanted to be proactive. I can't get pregnant, but I've been trying to be better as dating overall isn't what it used to be. Why do men act like toddlers having to wear a raincoat over their Halloween costume when it comes to practicing safe sex with a new partner they barely know?
|
datingoverfifty
|
t5_12ieog
|
Why do men not like condoms?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverfifty/comments/1b913fw/why_do_men_not_like_condoms/
|
pictogasm
|
2021-03-29 17:27:51
| 1,617,038,871 | null | null | 0 |
mfuojk
| true | null | 16 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/mfuojk/what_would_make_an_emotionally_healthy_dating_app/
| 0 |
Everyone seems to agree that modern swipe apps suck for just about everyone looking for an actual relationship. What would make an emotionally healthy and productive dating app for you? How would you make that work for all people all the time?
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
What would make an emotionally healthy dating app?
| null | 0.25 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/mfuojk/what_would_make_an_emotionally_healthy_dating_app/
|
awakenomad
|
2019-07-02 04:32:32
| 1,562,041,952 | null |
['bumble']
| 0 |
c84t3z
| true | null | 135 | 0 |
/r/datingoverthirty/comments/c84t3z/congrats_on_being_single/
| 873 |
Whether you're struggling with dating, happily single, lonely all the time, or working through your shit to become whole I say: Congrats on being single! If you're single right now it means you didn't settle for something that's less than what you want and deserve. It means you're working on yourself, you're learning and you're upholding your boundaries. It means that you are finding happiness within yourself and that you are not relying on other people to complete you. Or at least this is what I tell myself after deleting an unsolicited video from a bumble match of him jerking off and cumming all over himself. 😂 I cancelled our date.
|
datingoverthirty
|
t5_34cyw
|
Congrats on being single!
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/c84t3z/congrats_on_being_single/
|
Excellent-Abrocoma53
|
2022-12-17 09:07:28
| 1,671,268,048 | null |
['matched', 'dating app']
| 0 |
zo2dec
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 3 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/zo2dec/weird_dating_situation_need_another_outlook/
| 2 |
So, about a month ago, I downloaded a dating app. I matched with this guy and I could see we had great chemistry over text, so we decided to meet, went on a date and hooked up the next day. The sex was amazing, so we discussed the possibility of doing it again. However, I was moving to another city so the situation was not ideal. We kept on texting throughout the weeks, sometimes more sometimes less, and after 10 days I came back home and we hooked up again. Sex was great once more and I slept over and after sex we talked for three hours about everything and anything. I saw him again at the club that same night and then two days after I left for the other town once more. What I don't really get is the situation rn. We have discussed hooking up again, we have both said we have no interest in being exclusive. At the same time, I think we both enjoy each other's company a lot and love talking to each other. We've had a couple of days each week where we talk non-stop for several hours about the most random things. At the same time, now it's been a couple of days that his responses are super dilated in time(like once every 8 hours) and it has happened once last week as well. The thing is, I really don't mind either talking a lot or not talking at all unless we want to hook up. However, I don't really understand how he wants me to behave. I hate feeling like I am burdening people or imposing, and when he doesn't reply for hours and hours (while still being on his phone) it feels a bit like I am being clingy for just texting him within a reasonable time. And then we have these conversations which are super intense and I just don't get the jump between the two without any apparent reason or explanation. Let me clarify: I do not have feelings for this man. I don't want and I am not pursuing a relationship with him, I simply enjoy his company. At the same time, I can't help but wonder if he enjoys mine just the same when he doesn't reply for hours. I don't know whether I should stop replying, reply with his same pace or do whatever I feel like doing.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
weird dating situation, need another outlook
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/zo2dec/weird_dating_situation_need_another_outlook/
|
starskitty
|
2020-09-19 18:31:39
| 1,600,540,299 | null |
['OLD']
| 0 |
ivy0n8
| true | null | 20 | 0 |
/r/datingoverthirty/comments/ivy0n8/take_care_of_financial_situation_or_just_get_back/
| 8 |
35f, single parent. I got off the OLD apps when Covid hit and have been focusing on me. I would really like to be out of debt (it's not terrible but will be a couple years til I'm free) before getting serious about dating again but I'm lonely and let's face it, I'm struggling because I'm doing this alone. So do I get back on OLD and try to find that other half aka perfect sex roomie, or just keep on doing the single thing til I'm financially stable? (Being flippant on purpose, I know a partner is more than sex and splitting the bills)
|
datingoverthirty
|
t5_34cyw
|
Take care of financial situation or just get back out there?
| null | 0.83 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverthirty/comments/ivy0n8/take_care_of_financial_situation_or_just_get_back/
|
BurrStreetX
|
2018-06-20 14:23:50
| 1,529,504,630 | null |
['tinder']
| 0 |
8sip24
| true | null | 13 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/8sip24/long_post_but_i_am_at_a_point_where_a_need_advice/
| 4 |
Get ready peasants, this is gonna be a long ride that I will try and shorten up: I am a 23 year old guy, gay, and living in the midwest. A year ago I got out of a HORRID relationship, and have been single since. I am pretty damn picky. Its hard to find a gay guy, that (like me) doesn't act gay whatsoever, that likes creepy things like me, that has lots of tattoos, etc. (Also, if you are going to just say "you are young you still have time" just dont. I am 23, but I am looking for a real relationship, dont let my age be a factor to base advice off of) 2 months ago I met a guy on tinder. We bullshitted back and forth and right off the bat I knew I was going to like him. He is the most handsome guy I have ever seen. He asks if he can come and hangout for a bit at the bar with me and friends, and he does. Then over the course of the next month, things are going great, hanging out almost every night and he stays over almost every night, we have sex once. He was always complimenting me, and kissing / touching me. We are comfortable naked around each other, showering together, its great. He has my friends numbers, and they have his. They all love him, and he actually likes all of my friends. Then out of nowhere, he just "disconnects". Over the last three weeks, I have seen him 3 times. I will text him, and the average time that it takes for him to respond is about 5-6 hours. He just quit his job and went back to college, which is only 3-4 hours, 3 days a week roughly. So I cant justify the "He is just working" excuse. If I try and make plans, he just doesn't respond, then says "Oh I cant I'm doing X" and then doesn't respond for another 4-5 hours, by which time I am in bed and asleep. Even the texting is just not him, its short answers, and nothing himself, just replying because he has to (or that's how I perceive it). I did finally break down a few days ago, and had a conversation with him, which he communicated so that was great, about where this is going, what he is looking for etc. A no pressure type of conversation, just so that we could be on the same page. He respected that I asked, and while it wasn't really a solid answer, I felt so much better getting clarification. The TLDR of that convo was: He is not looking for something immediately, but if it happens, it happens, and he wont complain about it. I finally asked him if we could hangout / grab a drink / do whatever yesterday at 4:30pm, and he finally agreed to come over, he responded at 10pm-ish. He came over, things were good, but then when cuddling, he just felt different. He wasn't there, its like I was laying with a body. I went to work this morning, he left, and I sent over a quick "Hey, thanks for coming over last night, have a good day, and text me if you have some free time" text. The response I got was "Forsure" It might seem normal to you guys, but this is so unlike him, especially with going from seeing each other damn near everyday, to barely once a week. I know what this means, realistically, and it has been literally the only thing that I can think about. And its driving me INSANE. I realize that I might tend to know what I want, and fall for people fairly quickly, but I haven't liked anyone this much, ever, not even my ex of 3 years. And I know its a two way street, so he needs to feel that way too for it to work, but a month ago, that's how it was. I haven't shown him this complaining / stressed side of me about us, I dont want to come across as "that guy" so he has never seen me not calm and collected (minus being drunk and stressed, but that's different) I would post screenshots, to show how in tune we are both, and how much it has changed, but that's too much work right now. Help me get my fucking sanity back please. I just need to talk to random people and vent.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Long post, but I am at a point where a need advice, even If the only advice are things I already know but dont want to hear.
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/8sip24/long_post_but_i_am_at_a_point_where_a_need_advice/
|
Honest_Glove9962
|
2024-01-04 22:59:49
| 1,704,409,189 | 0 |
['dating app']
| 0 |
18yqrtz
| true |
Question ❓
| 1 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/18yqrtz/should_i_write_her_again/
| 1 |
me - can't wait to see you again, when are you gonna be free next week? her - i'll tell you later, management is coming and i have to coordinate with them me - wish you success, looking forward to see you the week is gonna be over soon and still no response. last message was last week. I feel she found someone else because we met on a dating app.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Should i write her again?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/18yqrtz/should_i_write_her_again/
|
whisper_18
|
2022-11-17 02:42:05
| 1,668,652,925 | null | null | 0 |
yxe82y
| true | null | 10 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/yxe82y/is_asking_for_verification_weird/
| 2 |
I’m (25F) new to the concept of online dating, and really just post pandemic dating in general. My last relationship/situationship was 3+ years ago and I havent made much effort to pursue anything since. I downloaded tinder for fun just to see what was out there but have no intention of hookups. I matched with a few guys and for the most part it was nothing special. Yesterday I matched with a guy who’s profile really stood out. He had some of the best quality pictures I had seen, he had a really good job and education, and our interests lined up really well. Only problem was that he wasn’t verified. He sent me some cheesy pick up line (that I’m sure he sends to every girl) about how I was a catch and he really wanted to get to know me. The text style seemed odd (ie. he used ‘U’ instead of ‘You’, and had no punctuation) but nothing too alarming. Normally I end up matching with verified profiles or can find the person online, however I wasn’t able to do that with this guy. Something about his info wasn’t lining up. I had a weird feeling that this was too good to be true so I light heartedly asked the guy to verify his account. (Im verified so only fair right?). I got no response. I sent something in the morning asking if he had an issue with the request/apologizing if it was not received well. He then proceeded to unmatch me. I’m very confused by his sudden change in behaviour. Clearly he wasn’t as interested as he said or maybe he was some type of catfish. Does anybody have experience with this? —— Edit: wanted to also add that his profile did not have any socials linked, and did not provide any handles/usernames —— Update: I did another search this morning using a name of the clothing brand on the guy’s shirt (looked like a shoot) and found an Instagram account. The tinder profile was stolen pictures
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
Is asking for verification weird?
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/yxe82y/is_asking_for_verification_weird/
|
AlaskaYoung5
|
2020-07-04 05:08:09
| 1,593,839,289 | null |
['matched']
| 0 |
hkxurs
| true | null | 5 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/hkxurs/the_unexpected_cruise_romance/
| 2 |
During New Years I went on a cruise ship with my family. I fell so deeply in love with this guy I met, there was something just so different and unique about him that made me fall so hard. I gave him my contact info expecting him to text me back after the cruise. I waited for so long without one text, 26 weeks just crying about this boy and how I’d probably never see him again. I would write journal entries about him almost every single night and I’d spend hours searching for his name on instagram without any luck. About 2 months ago I had gotten this spam call (at least I thought). 3 days ago I was looking through my old calls and saw the numbers matched his area code and I was like there’s noo way. It turned out to be him, I found it so crazy because literally 5 minutes before, I had written in my journal “I am done searching for you and when or if the time comes right you will be here with me.” I found that so weird, and my friends kept telling me it was prob just a coincidence. But there’s been too many of those, I keep hearing songs on the radio with the place he’s from in the lyrics and just today when I woke up someone had put the chocolates from the cruise ship on my steps, which is weird because those are over 26 weeks old and right after I find the guy I’ve been searching for this happens? I guess the real advice I need is... is it really worth it fighting for this love I’ve been waiting almost half a year for? And even after knowing he isn’t as invested in whatever we could possibly have. Also could these “coincidences” mean anything at all?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
The Unexpected Cruise Romance
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/hkxurs/the_unexpected_cruise_romance/
|
warmcoffee00
|
2023-10-19 09:15:21
| 1,697,706,921 | 0 |
['tinder']
| 0 |
17bex1h
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/17bex1h/not_sure_about_his_intentions/
| 1 |
Hey, I'm hospitalized in a psychiatric hospital and since I was bored I downloaded tinder, not expecting much out of it. Instead, I met a military guy I really like. He's 26, I'm 25. We text and video call everyday, we did sexting a lot. He says he's serious about me. I am not sure if I should trust him since I'm really fragile and my mental health isn't the greatest. I cant afford a heartbreak now.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Not sure about his intentions
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/17bex1h/not_sure_about_his_intentions/
|
BroadStreet_Bully5
|
2017-08-24 11:36:22
| 1,503,574,582 | null |
['dating apps', 'pof']
| 0 |
6vq93f
| false | null | 12 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/6vq93f/this_is_what_a_610_pof_looks_like_after_two_days/
| 1 |
Friend of mine sent me this. She's not ugly, but not a dime. I was just amazed. 2 days she said. This is why I hate dating apps and this why no one ever returns your messages. They're a joke. http://imgur.com/vUShRG7
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
This is what a 6/10 PoF looks like after two days.
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/6vq93f/this_is_what_a_610_pof_looks_like_after_two_days/
|
vpons89
|
2023-11-07 10:16:49
| 1,699,352,209 | 0 | null | 0 |
17pr5c0
| true | null | 106 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/17pr5c0/regardless_of_where_you_are_in_the_convo_if_you/
| 1 |
Tired of seeing “its only ghosting if you’ve met or have planned a date” if you’ve began a conversation even if you’ve only had one text exchange and you don’t say your not interested or unmatch its still ghosting. You can make up whatever arbitrary rules you want to try to justify it but by definition its still ghosting.
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
Regardless of where you are in the convo, if you dont say your not interested or unmatch then your ghosting
| 1 | 0.37 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/17pr5c0/regardless_of_where_you_are_in_the_convo_if_you/
|
blueacidb00ts
|
2019-12-05 17:32:28
| 1,575,567,148 | null |
['matched', 'OLD', 'online dating']
| 0 |
e6kh4t
| true |
Question
| 26 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/e6kh4t/did_i_dodge_a_bullet/
| 4 |
Curious, I matched with someone on OLD we swapped numbers/social media and she was cool but decided OLD wasn't for me as it was wasting so much time. I said this to her and wished her all the best and that was that, she said we should still meet for a coffee as I seemed cool but I reiterated that it's still a date so declined. She said she also deleted the app because it wasn't for her. Fast forward a week later and we've been speaking on insta and she wants to meet for a coffee and again I explained that us meeting is a date, she seems to to think that it'd be as friends.. And again I declined. She mentioned I must think she's crazy because she keeps asking me and I keep declining. She seems really decent, hard worker, confident, stubborn (which she agreed) but I'm wondering why she doesn't just move on, I can't imagine asking someone to meet several times and being rejected. Have I dodged a bullet or do you reckon she's just a nice person who wants a coffee just as friends? \This is a very very, very long shot but bare with me, she responded to my instagram story last week asking which bar it was, I responded and asked her a question back, she never responded but read the message. I posted another story which she saw but still hadn't responded to my messaged. A few days later I posted a story of a modelling job I done (Fitness, torso, good lighting, smouldering looks...It's all part of the job I promise) And she responded to it straight away, She apologised for not responding to my last message and ever since that last story she's been glued to my leg it seems. Apologise for the long post guys, I've been thinking about it the last few days, it's not important as some of the other posts on here I understand but more for my curiosity and just intrigued. tl;dr Met girl on OLD, decided didn't want to do online dating any longer but she still wants to meet, despite saying no 10 times.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Did I dodge a bullet?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/e6kh4t/did_i_dodge_a_bullet/
|
Kind_Lawfulness_347
|
2023-06-27 19:44:02
| 1,687,895,042 | 0 |
['dating apps', 'dating sites', 'tinder', 'bumble']
| 0 |
14kndd9
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 0 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/14kndd9/what_do_you_do_when_everything_else_doesnt_work/
| 1 |
This one will be kind of long, I apologize! 24/m I've never had much luck dating. When I was in Highschool I dated one girl and it was ROUGH. We dated for a few months and I never had the courage to kiss her. I dated another girl a few years later for about the same time, and I felt much more confident with stuff like that. I was later diagnosed with high functioning autism and I guess it explained everything lol. I have social anxiety, overthink about what I should say, and I hate moving my body because I feel awkward in my own skin. I tried dating apps unsuccessfully for five or so years. If I'm being honest, I'm probably a 6.5 out of 10 as far as looks goes, and my looks seem to be deteriorating a little bit. My hairline is starting to recede and my forehead looks big now. No biggie. If it's not something you can control there's no point worrying about it. I figure it's either a lifetime of insecurity and pills/transplants or I deal with the insecurity and fix my self-esteem. I've come a long way as far as my self-esteem goes. I've gotten over my depression and my anxiety, and I have amazing friends now that I love with all of my heart. I'm a lucky guy. My body count is around 10-ish and I'm thankful that I've had the opportunity because I'm sure a lot of guys with autism would struggle more than I would, even if most were one-night stands. I guess I'm comfortable being alone now if that's what ends up happening. I've seen the devastating effects a bad relationship can have on a person (several times). But I guess I can't help but feel a little insecure every time I'm rejected (I know it's normal). It's happened hundreds of times and most often on dating sites. Now I get maybe 10 likes on tinder and maybe 10 on bumble every time I download the app. Kind of sucks. I've taken hundreds of photos of myself and used Photofeeler to find the best ones. But at some point I guess you have to ask yourself if finding the best photo is kind of a form of catfishing because you don't look like that regularly. Right off the bat I can tell most girls aren't interested in what I have to say, or they slowly lose interest over time. I feel like most of the girls that I'm attracted to don't feel the same way about me. I try to hold my enthusiasm as we text and try to be myself, but it usually ends the same way. I'm ghosted and have to start from square 1. I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing wrong and I don't really know how to fix it because I'm not really sure how people act normally. How would you get over something like this? I've read dating books, listened to dating advice, and it always ends the same way. Maybe some people aren't meant to be in a relationship. &x200B; &x200B;
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
What do you do when everything else doesn't work and you kind of give up?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/14kndd9/what_do_you_do_when_everything_else_doesnt_work/
|
frosting-spoonfuls
|
2021-01-29 22:54:42
| 1,611,960,882 | null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0 |
l86wh6
| true | null | 19 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/l86wh6/what_if_height_matters/
| 0 |
I (F23) matched with a guy (m26) on tinder a few days ago. We hit it off, really, really well He seems to be as interested in me as I am in him but I have one slight concern. I am a decently tall girl, about 5'8 and I'm worried he might be shorter than me. I know for most this is not a big issue BUT my height is something that I have always felt very self conscious about and don't know how to bring up the question asking how tall he is OR if I should even ask What should I do?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
What if height matters!
| null | 0.38 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/l86wh6/what_if_height_matters/
|
wildstar100
|
2023-11-09 17:41:18
| 1,699,551,678 | 0 |
['swipe', 'swiped', 'online dating', 'dating app', 'bumble']
| 0 |
17rigy3
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 3 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/17rigy3/joined_online_dating_too_soon/
| 1 |
So I am in a bit of a conundrum. I joined the dating app Bumble last night and woke up this morning to find I had been liked several times. I decided to pay for a one time premium upgrade. And I haven’t swiped right on any of the people who liked me yet. I’m hesitant to do so simply due to the fact that I am supposed to move in with my grandfather. For context, my grandmother passed last December and he needs some financial support now that his income has been slashed in half. Family is extremely important to me and I am stepping up to the plate to help support him during what is likely going to be his final years. My question to you fellow Redditors, should I wait until I finish moving to swipe right, potentially losing on these possible relationships or should I swipe right now, and explain my situation and hope for the best?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Joined Online Dating Too Soon?
| 1 | 0.5 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/17rigy3/joined_online_dating_too_soon/
|
Timely_Treacle_5660
|
2024-03-11 01:50:14
| 1,710,121,814 | 0 |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
1bbrjy4
| true |
Just Venting 😮💨
| 1 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/1bbrjy4/wanting_a_relationship_but_not_knowing_about_kids/
| 3 |
Something that really pisses me off when I’m on dating apps is when a guy (age set 23-35) says that they’re looking for a long term relationship (or whatever the app says) but doesn’t know about kids. Like that is such an important factor in a relationship that you need to figure out BEFORE you get into a long term one. I know for absolute certain that I do not ever want kids (biological or adopted) so why the fuck would I want to get into a relationship with someone who could possibly change their mind and want them someday because they haven’t figured it out. I wouldn’t expect someone to get into a relationship with me if they wanted kids. If you’ve decided that you’re ready for a relationship then you best have figured out if you want kids or not because otherwise you’re just wasting everyone’s time and energy. It’s especially a pain the older they are. Like have you not had enough time to give it a thought. (And I know there’s women that are like this too or that some of them are just lying to get with people…)
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Wanting a relationship but not knowing about kids
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1bbrjy4/wanting_a_relationship_but_not_knowing_about_kids/
|
bthetpv
|
2020-08-24 06:16:49
| 1,598,249,809 | null |
['tinder']
| 0 |
ifjp1x
| true | null | 10 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/ifjp1x/checked_his_phone_againwould_like_to_tell_him/
| 1 |
My boyfriend (23M) and I (22F) have been dating for more than 9 months. Met on tinder last year in April, finally met in November. One of my biggest insecurities is jealousy and I can seriously let it get ahold of me. I checked his phone when first started dating and before we met, he talked to so many girls on either IG and snapchat, replied to their stories, complimenting them. Really, I just don’t want to look stupid because I have been cheated on before and I act like this because I would never do it to anyone. But social media has put a strain in our relationship, just the lack of trust and we almost broke up several times because of it. It truly makes me depressed. I’m one of those people who don’t like when their significant other likes girl pictures and follows them, etc because I have a poor self image, my self confidence has been at a all time low lately. I often compare myself to other girls. I told myself I wouldn’t check his phone because I NEED to learn how to trust him but I couldn’t fight the urge several times AND tonight. When we were rolling (on x) in early Jan/Feb this year, he told me about this girl I know of from our city, she seems popular and is absolutely beautiful. He told me they used to talk and are now “close friends”. Well let’s say in June/July, I checked his phone and he messaged her on IG with her post because she moved to Cali with “😭” like what, you miss her? Then tonight I checked again, he sent her some messages last week saying “hope you’re doing well, you come across my mind often” I cried. Because well I don’t know, I don’t really know what to think. He has found out I went on his phone earlier this year and I’m sure he’d burst if I told him about this. But I want to get that out of my head, and I’m thinking of telling him but then I don’t.. help? Thanks to anyone who took up time to read this, needed to vent.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Checked his phone again..would like to tell him what I saw but I don’t but I feel extremely sad...
| null | 0.99 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/ifjp1x/checked_his_phone_againwould_like_to_tell_him/
|
Genzhateclub
|
2022-11-09 05:17:26
| 1,667,971,046 | null |
['matches', 'hinge']
| 0 |
yq9g7x
| true | null | 7 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/yq9g7x/hinge_dating/
| 1 |
Is it normal for men to right away ask to hang out before asking for my number or have one conversation? so many of my matches have been just asking to meet up off the bat…
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Hinge dating
| null | 0.67 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/yq9g7x/hinge_dating/
|
livingwell1332
|
2021-09-18 19:37:06
| 1,631,993,826 | null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0 |
pqsyj0
| true | null | 5 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/pqsyj0/an_old_tinder_match_21f_reached_out_to_me_20m/
| 1 |
I matched with this girl a few months back and she had discussed a hookup situation. I wasn’t digging it and we agreed to be friends. We’ve talked on and off since she moved back to college and she reached out to me today after a month or two… which really flattered me ngl. Thing is, I kinda regret that decision of forgoing the whole summer fling and not seeing how things would go. Any advice on what to do/say to her to maybe re-initiate things?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
An old tinder match (21F) reached out to me (20M) again
| null | 0.67 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/pqsyj0/an_old_tinder_match_21f_reached_out_to_me_20m/
|
Careless-Archer-1558
|
2023-09-26 12:15:28
| 1,695,730,528 | 0 |
['matches', 'dating apps']
| 0 |
16sm8t5
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 1 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/16sm8t5/i_have_a_stutter_and_i_suffer_from_rsd_and_trauma/
| 1 |
So I’ve had a pretty bad stutter my whole life which has stopped me approaching women, I’m not a bad looking guy and I have interesting shit to say or whatever but I’m just very bad at those first interactions, and I end up talking in half sentences to avoid stuttering, not just that but I’ll maybe take too long to make a move. I did have a gf in uni but I left uni because I couldn’t engage with it, my life’s been difficult so far, and she was a terrible person cba to even get started on that. Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria causes me to just have such horrible anxiety around how people will respond to my stutter ( asked a girl out in high school and got rejected over specifically my stutter) Yeah I’ve got other issues going on and I’m broke as hell with terrible physical health (issues with overpronation of my ankle, but I still run 2k a day because I don’t want to use it as an excuse ) Was working in a warehouse but literally couldn’t even walk home my foot got so bad. So, for a 22 year old and I’m trying to get myself fixed up so that I can get a decent job and start to sustain myself a bit more, but I’m super lonely. I live in homeless prevention or like supported housing on my own and I don’t have any real friends where I live, but I feel this dark resentment towards the idea that no one loves who I am now enough to fight with me and grow together… and then eventually I get my shit sorted then people become interested in the material person you created? Seems dystopian. Dating apps are not working just don’t get any matches or whatever. Don’t really know what people are gunna say but yeah that’s my situation.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
I have a stutter, and I suffer from RSD and trauma, just feel like I’m gunna die alone.
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/16sm8t5/i_have_a_stutter_and_i_suffer_from_rsd_and_trauma/
|
Revolutionary-Cap967
|
2021-12-03 04:12:15
| 1,638,504,735 | null |
['OLD']
| 0 |
r7q3s9
| true | null | 6 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/r7q3s9/1st_date_and_he_asked_if_i_wanted_to_invite_my/
| 1 |
Not sure how to go about this. I’m 26F and he is 29M. First time this has ever happened to me. Met off of OLD. He asked me out and suggested doing a painting date, which sounds fun and beyond just drinks. Anyways, I said yes and we’re sorting out a time. When he asked “does your friend want to tag along?” 👀 Tbh I mentioned my friend once, in passing, saying how she lived near him. But, I’m stumped at what to say…I thought it was our first date..? Conversation was flowing normally…. I’m stumped. I’ve never had this happen to me.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
1st date and he asked if I wanted to invite my friend?
| null | 0.67 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/r7q3s9/1st_date_and_he_asked_if_i_wanted_to_invite_my/
|
BatmanAdams
|
2023-10-18 19:05:07
| 1,697,655,907 | 0 |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
17ayjzx
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 1 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/17ayjzx/trouble_finding_a_starting_point/
| 1 |
I am a 26M who is in his second year of medical school. I've had two long-term relationships before. Both of them ended poorly; one with me being serially cheated on and the second with my emotional needs being unapologetically neglected until I cordially ended the relationship. It's been a year since that second relationship and now I'd like to try dating again. However, since starting school, I've had no luck finding female friends. This, in turn, has kept me from going on any dates. In recent years, I feel that I've done good work on myself through finding hobbies I love (BJJ, competitive video game leagues, and playing an instrument at a beginner-intermediate level), getting in shape (I run/lift 3x a week), and I hold strong research positions at my institution. I'm also unusually charismatic and conversational, so on a social level approaching/talking to women is not an issue for me. &x200B; My notable obstacles are 1) at my age, many kind/attractive women are engaged/married/years into a relationship. 2) My religious convictions include remaining celibate until marriage, which understandably makes it hard to date in the modern era. I have trouble finding women who are both of my faith and compatible with me, partly because women in that circle get married much younger. 3) Being a chronic student, I have no financial means to take someone out on a date. 4) I am not attractive enough for dating apps. 6/10 looks-wise, maybe a 7 on a good day :) &x200B; I think the hardest part of dating is just finding a good way to put yourself out there and taking every opportunity to meet people. However, I'm struggling to find a good starting point for myself given the circumstances and my lack of experience. Would really appreciate any advice or discussion!
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Trouble Finding a Starting Point
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/17ayjzx/trouble_finding_a_starting_point/
|
Strangeponder
|
2024-07-16 17:51:00
| 1,721,152,260 | 0 |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
1e4v3nm
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1e4v3nm/dont_know_where_to_start/
| 1 |
Hello! I (M21) haven't dated since high school, and I've been focusing on myself and my future, and now I'm a slightly above average looking, decently in shape, and have a steady and well paying job. And now I want to get out there and find a girlfriend, the only problem is I have no idea where to start, I don't go out drinking, to any clubs, and mostly a homebody, I've tried dating apps but it's very hard for me to genuinely connect to anyone like that. Any tips or places I should try?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Don't know where to start
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1e4v3nm/dont_know_where_to_start/
|
Alittlelostsheep
|
2017-06-17 09:12:33
| 1,497,690,753 | null |
['dating app']
| 0 |
6hsi12
| null | null | 32 | null |
/r/dating_advice/comments/6hsi12/why_do_men_only_want_booty_calls_from_me/
| 6 |
Whether we meet in a bar, political event or a dating app, it always ends up leading to the guy initiating a booty call. I like to think I am pretty conservative, body count of two at 25. I don't show a lot of skin(not that it measures anything but some people are stupid enough to think that the way you dress can signal stuff). I'm educated, open minded and I let my hair down every months because I am still young and single but deep down I just want a man who doesnt just want sex with me. FYI, I never give in to booty calls. I was recently speaking to a cute, educated, geeky, local guy who showed a lot of interest. He initiated a date in the evening to get drinks but I told him I could not do that day as had family coming over. He then texts me at 12am the next day, asking to meet for drinks in an hour. I was really upset because on paper this guy was perfect and he had shown so much interest that he liked me. I broke down at home and text him and made it clear to him that "I do not meet guys at 1am, if you want to meet, we can do that in the day time" to which he said "ok we will meet during the day next week". Am I right to assume he is still looking for a booty call? Anyways, i'm done with men. I'm yet to meet a real man who doesn't get over hyped when I tell him I model on my weekends, no idea why but these guys seem to find that more interesting than my law degree. I've lost hope with men
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Why do men only want booty calls from me?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/6hsi12/why_do_men_only_want_booty_calls_from_me/
|
Lonley_Lover
|
2023-04-19 01:52:04
| 1,681,869,124 | 0 |
['online dating']
| 0 |
12rckun
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 9 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/12rckun/struggling_to_get_back_out_there/
| 1 |
I (25m) got out of a 2 year relationship about five months ago. It was very one sided and I ended it because when I opened up about what was concerning me she (24f) couldn’t have cared less. I don’t believe the break up even affected her honestly. I’ve been starting to try online dating and even a few social gatherings but I can’t seem to have any luck. I’m quite the social person but I’m afraid I may seem like the guy who’s better as a friend. Any advice on what to do differently, where I may have a positive experience, or just encouragement?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Struggling to get back out there
| 1 | 0.99 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/12rckun/struggling_to_get_back_out_there/
|
throwaway10492672
|
2023-08-12 22:26:14
| 1,691,879,174 | 0 |
['dating app']
| 0 |
15phjlb
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/15phjlb/a_guy_ive_been_seeing37m_told_me34f_he_deleted/
| 1 |
I[34f] had a fight with a guy I’ve been seeing[37m] and went home separately. After we made up he told me he was so upset that he even installed a dating app but he deleted it after getting bombed with messages as he found it stressful. I found this funny because wouldn’t a guy be happy when he’s bombed with messages? I went to one myself and soon found his account alive. I messaged him I found it and that he lied to my face. He got very defensive saying he just deleted it so his profile should still be floating there and what do you expect when you gave me such terror two days ago. I felt that it was just opening up a plan b to delete the app but not the account so didn’t feel a point to continue with him. What other lies can he tell right? And a night before he told me he’s really reliable and loyal. Is this time to leave? [TL;DR] A guy I’ve been seeing[37m] told me[34f] he deleted dating app but I found his account. Scum alert?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
A guy I’ve been seeing[37m] told me[34f] he deleted dating app but I found his account
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/15phjlb/a_guy_ive_been_seeing37m_told_me34f_he_deleted/
|
magicmikejones
|
2020-12-14 00:59:03
| 1,607,907,543 | null |
['matches', 'dating apps']
| 0 |
kcn2i9
| true |
Tinder/Online Dating
| 13 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/kcn2i9/how_to_find_someone_when_you_are_an_alternative/
| 11 |
I am 28M. I am a composer, guitarist, and occultist. My interests are music, philosophy, sociology, anthropology, psychology/psychoanalysis, religion, etc. I’m very serious about dedicating myself full time to my interests, and I’m working on making a career out of them. Despite being very talkative and having a lot of friends, I rarely feel connections with people. I’ve only dated 4 people in my life, and the relationships never last more than 2 or 3 months. I live in a small, conservative city, and have not had any success with meeting local women on dating apps, so I expanded my matches to be anywhere in the world, and still nothing. I’m wondering if maybe there is a different way to meet a girl with similar interests. What do you guys think?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
How to find someone when you are an “alternative” person?
| null | 0.92 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/kcn2i9/how_to_find_someone_when_you_are_an_alternative/
|
No-Consideration1105
|
2022-04-29 02:15:27
| 1,651,198,527 | null |
['dating app', 'dating apps']
| 0 |
uebgcv
| true | null | 10 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/uebgcv/i_always_start_dating_apps_then_chicken_out_and/
| 2 |
How do I become more brave and start getting into dating. My friends suggested starting a dating app since I've never dated a guy before but dating apps so far have kinda terrified me and I don't usually post photos of myself too. I usually have no problem speaking with people online or in person when it's not dating related but dating apps make me very nervous. If there's an alternative way to meet a guy or a way to get over my dating app fears I'll take any advice.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
I always start dating apps then chicken out and delete them.
| null | 0.75 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/uebgcv/i_always_start_dating_apps_then_chicken_out_and/
|
[deleted]
|
2020-11-26 19:32:23
| 1,606,419,143 | null |
['dating app', 'hinge']
| 0 |
k1lqft
| true | null | 11 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/k1lqft/thoughts_on_double_texting_a_fairly_new_girl/
| 1 |
Met a girl on a dating app about a week and a half ago. We are from same hometown/high school etc but I am a bit older than her. Wondering the thoughts on double messaging her. She agreed to go to dinner after this week and that it sounded fun, and we added each other on snap. Not a lot of activity on snap so far but ideally I can get her and avoid the dumb messaging on hinge. She did not reply to my last message a few days ago just making conversation but I know she was to be busy this week... is it bad to message her again asking if we are still on for dinner /get her ? I don’t wanna come across as annoying. I know I haven’t met her yet but she’s quite beautiful and would want to at least try . I won’t be snapping her unless she happens to snap me so there’s that. TL;DR: thoughts on double messaging a girl I have not met yet, only conversed a decent amount on a dating app?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Thoughts on double texting a fairly new girl
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/k1lqft/thoughts_on_double_texting_a_fairly_new_girl/
|
Future_Ad8467
|
2022-02-21 02:37:05
| 1,645,411,025 | null |
['online dating', 'dating app', 'dating apps', 'tinder', 'bumble', 'pof']
| 0 |
sxieza
| true |
Question
| 74 | 0 |
/r/datingoverforty/comments/sxieza/online_dating_frustration/
| 6 |
(41M) I subscribed to Bumble, thinking it should be a good change from the other dating apps. I've tried Match, Tinder, POF and now Bumble. I've come across a few profiles of people that liked me first, I like them back, now we're a match, great! They have 24 hours to send me a message. On these two particular profiles, embedded in the prompts, it says to extend time, in order to prove I like them. Ugh, now it's a game. What dating app has worked best for you? Update: I have a date on Wednesday on Bumble
|
datingoverforty
|
t5_su6ij
|
Online dating frustration
| null | 0.72 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverforty/comments/sxieza/online_dating_frustration/
|
[deleted]
|
2015-08-13 08:14:37
| 1,439,453,677 | 0 |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0 |
3gts5m
| null | null | 1 | null |
/r/dating_advice/comments/3gts5m/what_to_do_next_if_anything/
| 7 |
Backstory: I [27M] matched with very attractive woman [24F] on Tinder. She messages me first. We meet up later the same day at a bar, drink, talk, hit it off. We kiss at end of date. She texts me a fair amount in between these dates, just about every day. A lot of just general "how was ur day" stuff. 2nd Date: Outdoor music festival/walking around interesting area of city. I'm starting to feel some real connection here. Kiss again at end of date. 3rd date: We cook dinner together at my house. Drinks, food, conversation, chemistry. Things are going well. We make out for a little bit on the couch. Then she says... "Word vomit is about to come out of mouth... I'm not interested in being anybody's girlfriend right now, I recently (2 months ago) got out of a long-term (4-year) relationship." I tell her, "That's fine. I'm in a somewhat similar situation." (1 year relationship, broke up 6 months ago [did not divulge these specifics, fyi]) I also confirmed she DOES want to keep hanging out in the future. No further discussion on the matter. Later that same night, things turn to bedroom--oral sex, and lying naked together for a bit listening to music. She rests her head on my chest and says, "This is nice," in that pillow-talk way that just gets me. Eventually she leaves, and I kiss her goodbye. That was a Friday. Saturday afternoon we text a bit about something we talked about yesterday, and I ask if she wants to get together on Sunday for brunch (she's a self-proclaimed lover of brunch). No response until Sunday morning where she gives me some excuse like she was out and drunk, and she already has brunch plans. I say, "Ha, I see. Have a good brunch," and don't text back again for another two days--some innocuous text about finishing watching Game of Thrones Season 5 (I know she's watched it and read the books). No response. It's been about 24 hours and change. Assuming she just isn't going to respond to this message, is there anything I can do to salvage this? How long do I wait to send another text? Two days? A Week? Two weeks? Call her? Just give up; she doesn't like you? (seriously, though, why go through the trouble of having lenhy conversations getting to know someone, get to the point where you can get naked together and have fun in bed, tell them you want to keep hanging out, and then just stop abruptly?) I figure there's plenty of possibilities as to why she hasn't responded: Got close to someone after being in long term relationship and feels guilty/weird about it, just wanted to have some physical connection to help sever ties to old BF (ie. I'm just a rebound), found some better dude(s) on Tinder, somehow didn't notice/read text (unlikely, I know), who knows? I'm more interested in what I should do next, if anything. Obviously don't want to come off as too forward/clingy/needy, but also don't want to be a total stranger--I want to take this girl out again. Should I just directly ask to do something next? Should I address the fact that she left me hanging? TL;DR The third date led to sparks, but now she's not responding. Play it cool and don't text back? For how long? Or just move on?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
What to do next (if anything)?
| 7 | null |
http://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/3gts5m/what_to_do_next_if_anything/
|
JomboEX
|
2024-03-22 18:28:21
| 1,711,132,101 | 0 |
['dating app']
| 0 |
1bl6bko
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1bl6bko/what_am_i_doing_wrongwhat_should_i_go_or_do/
| 1 |
Hello guys. So i am 30(M) never in my life had a girlfriend(not even as a kid) so i want to experience the feelings like going on a coffee date or in the park,holding hands,sharing personal stuff all things that my fellow classmates were doing 15 years ago. So i made up my mind and made account in dating app 2 weeks ago,my experience? In the first day i managed to even get a girl to like me(without me liking her first),and 2 other girls liked me back. But the main problem i stumble upon is that i dont know what to talk about,and another thing is that i feel the ball is in me the whole time. Like i always need to come up with something to ask or talk about,some of there reply is really short,i am even lucky if i get some question asked about me. Like i can probably count the questions i have been asked personally by the girls. Most of the time i need to keep up the conversation going which at times becomes just tiring and boring. Like sometimes i wonder why dont some of them just unmatch me, instead of just answering with yes-no or other short reply without even ending with question. Like in work,to 85% of my female coworkers i need to say 1 word and they can just go talk and talk about all kinds of stuff and still ask me something. Here in the dating app its the total opposite,i am even shocked how NOT talkative or openly are. So i am wondering,do i need to keep up with the dating app and wait for the special someone or just try to find women in real life,but the other question is what to do in real life ? I dont have hobbies,i dont go outside,most of my daily routine is work-home,i am really shy and awkward as a person,and i am living in a small town with not much young people so that makes it even more difficult.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
What am i doing wrong,what should i go or do ?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1bl6bko/what_am_i_doing_wrongwhat_should_i_go_or_do/
|
matk95
|
2017-08-23 03:57:51
| 1,503,460,671 | null |
['tinder']
| 0 |
6vghag
| false | null | 5 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/6vghag/seeing_a_girl_but_dont_know_what_to_think_of_it/
| 2 |
So I met this girl through tinder, we met 3 times so far, about once a week, one time just casual chat at night because we're both busy but it went well. Second time I drove her to nearby cliffs to watch the shooting stars. That went well too, on both of these we were talking a lot, laughing, enjoying the time. We met third time for a cinema night and then went to a pub to drink a beer. Now all these went great, she kissed me goodbye etc but I never escalated any physical contact. The thing that bothers me isn't the dates itself, it's the inbetween texting, which basically, at the start she would text me a lot, and the messages would be somewhat long and it would be easy to keep a conversation. Past couple of days it looks like she's distant, takes longer to reply, and her replies are usually short and nothing like when we first started texting. Now that might be due because she got a new job and doesn't have that much time but I see her online on messenger and still she takes her time to reply. I really like her and I'd like to see where things will go but I really don't know and can't decipher her motives. Like she only moved into the country couple of weeks ago and I fear she's going out with me out of boredom, because she has nothing else to do and doesn't have many friends here yet. I really don't know what to think, when I try to plan something she's always positive about stuff but I just can't tell if she's doing it out of boredom and I'm essentially wasting my time seeing her. It also might be that I'm just over analysing this stuff...
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Seeing a girl but don't know what to think of it
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/6vghag/seeing_a_girl_but_dont_know_what_to_think_of_it/
|
Elegant_blue_93
|
2023-08-07 02:24:20
| 1,691,375,060 | 0 |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
15k7tfs
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/15k7tfs/how_do_i29f_meet_a_decent_guy/
| 1 |
I've been single for a while now, and I'd really like to meet a decent guy. I've had zero luck in since my ex ghosted me. I met him at a previous job 3 years ago. However, I work from home now. I got to the gym, but I'm too shy to approach men, and I don't have a lot of experience outside of my ex and my first relationship before dating him. I know I'm a decent and attractive woman. I don't cheat. I'm honest, loyal, goofy if you get to know me, and loving. I'm just inexperienced, very shy, and I look young for my age. People usually think I'm 18 or 19. I've read that most decent guys are probably working from home and going to the gym. However, guys at my gym don't approach me, and there are tons of other girls for them to choose from. I've tried dating apps, but I don't take good photos. &x200B;
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
How do I(29f) meet a decent guy?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/15k7tfs/how_do_i29f_meet_a_decent_guy/
|
Vert190
|
2023-11-15 22:52:02
| 1,700,088,722 | 0 |
['matched', 'dating app']
| 0 |
17w6fwp
| true | null | 2 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/17w6fwp/how_should_i_try_something_with_an_old/
| 1 |
hi, i started using a dating app, and while scrolling i saw a woman from my old high school. We weren't friends in high school but we got along, and had a few laughs. She was a popular girl and i was a nerdy, kinda ugly, guy. Years have passed, didnt think about her until i saw her again in the app. We are currently both 26. I matched her, i assumed because i left her an opening about out past, and we chatted abit. She reacted in a friendly manner, she shared, and gave long answers. I invited her to a friendly coffee tomorrow, and if it goes well i intend to ask her out. I assume she has some interest in me as a person, but im not sure how should i approach the subject, since i am not a lady's man, need some advice, thanks
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
how should i try something with an old acquaintance?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/17w6fwp/how_should_i_try_something_with_an_old/
|
TecksMecks
|
2015-03-04 10:49:44
| 1,425,466,184 | 0 |
['dating sites']
| 0 |
2xw97r
| null | null | 541 | null |
/r/AskMen/comments/2xw97r/on_dating_sites_how_do_you_feel_when_the_girls/
| 489 |
....cuz it kind of pisses me off. It seems incredibly accusatory and negative. And of course, if I was a jerk or a player, I would obviously ignore their request. Anyway, I find it so refreshing when a woman's profile is entirely positive.
|
AskMen
|
t5_2s30g
|
On dating sites, how do you feel when the girl's profile says something like "Don't email me if you are a jerk or a player"?
| 489 | null |
http://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/2xw97r/on_dating_sites_how_do_you_feel_when_the_girls/
|
deezseeds
|
2021-08-26 09:27:26
| 1,629,970,046 | null |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
pbvz4c
| true | null | 36 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/pbvz4c/im_25_and_still_single_people_are_telling_me_im/
| 20 |
I will hold my hands up and admit the reason I've not had a relationship since 18 was due to my mentall illness and anxiety, I never felt good enough to even try. It's my fault really, no one is to blame for me. Recently I have made positive changes, such as joining the gym, being more social etc, but this is all very recent. However, what really gets to me is constantly being reminded that I should be seeing someone now, I understand this, it's a social norm to find a partner when your nearly 26 like me, but I've had my reasons why I haven't yet. I'm going to try my best either way because I want to find someone who likes me who I like too, it just hasn't happened for me yet, my own doing too, I don't have the victim mentality, it just upsets me and worries me that everyone sees me as a loser, a failure for being alone and having very limited experience, romantically, with women. I'm on dating apps, will try and meet someone at a bar, I don't really want to join any clubs as I already play for a football team with guys, so I don't really have any other avenues to find someone. I do fear being alone at 30+, this is my biggest fear.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
I'm 25 and still single, people are telling me I'm getting on now and should be with someone, I feel bad about this.
| null | 0.86 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/pbvz4c/im_25_and_still_single_people_are_telling_me_im/
|
sarahnada96
|
2024-06-27 12:41:18
| 1,719,492,078 | 0 |
['bumble', 'hinge']
| 0 |
1dpqc5s
| true | null | 14 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1dpqc5s/i_think_i_found_the_one/
| 1 |
So I have been dating through bumble and hinge for a while on and off. Yesterday was the first time that I go to a date and I really feel what the French call « me feeling » He’s such a nice guy, gentleman and ticks all the right boxes, green flags all over him. And I’m going on a gym date with him today or Saturday Please tell me what NOT TO DO in this stage, I really like him and don’t want to miss it up.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
I think I found the one
| 1 | 0.33 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1dpqc5s/i_think_i_found_the_one/
|
djxpress
|
2024-02-24 20:47:43
| 1,708,807,663 | 0 | null | 0 |
1az4xau
| true | null | 0 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/1az4xau/new_to_old_is_it_common_to_get_ghosted_after/
| 1 |
I'm a 40+ year old male using Hinge in So Cal. I get plenty of matches and have gone on a few dates. Got my old gf from the app after joining the first week. No longer with gf so decided to go back on the app. I've had several matches, texting, exchanging phone numbers, and even talking on phone with the other person. Had a couple instances where the other person basically ghosted me and didn't respond on the day we were supposed to go out. Had another person basically ghost me after we went out kissed, and planned another date. Then had someone basically unmatch me after telling me they'd like to go out in a week or so. Not used to this sort of thing. Is it pretty common? There is one match I've been talking to and have seen a couple of times, so at least it's looking positive.
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
New to OLD, is it common to get ghosted after talking and making plans?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/1az4xau/new_to_old_is_it_common_to_get_ghosted_after/
|
n351320447
|
2024-07-31 05:30:11
| 1,722,403,811 | 0 |
['hinge']
| 0 |
1egfblw
| true |
Question ❓
| 3 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/1egfblw/what_to_do_when_you_get_a_match_on_hinge/
| 1 |
The initial like had a question on a prompt they had. They match with me but don’t answer my initial question. FYI I’m Male matching with Females. Do you just re ask the question lol.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
What to do when you get a match on hinge?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1egfblw/what_to_do_when_you_get_a_match_on_hinge/
|
thebuttcake
|
2020-10-12 02:02:04
| 1,602,468,124 | null |
['online dating']
| 0 |
j9i87v
| true | null | 6 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/j9i87v/i_24f_struggle_with_wanting_to_get_attention_from/
| 1 |
I went out recently with a friend and dressed really nicely, I know I looked good and if anything I felt a bit self conscious because I knew I would be looked at a lot. I was right, and at one point a guy came up to us and starting talking to us. My friend is very outgoing and talked to him, I mostly just nodded or smiled. It got to a point where my friend told the guy I’m pretty shy, almost as to explain my silence. It was kind of embarrassing but I also just wasn’t into him. That experience got me to thinking of all the times I’ve gone out, I do get attention and every once in a while someone will come up to me. But I just immediately feel uncomfortable and I clam up. I’m sure this stems from unwanted creepy attention from men since I was a kid. I’m sure I come off as standoffish and uninterested, but what no one knows is what I want most right now is a fulfilling relationship. Online dating has led to a few nice guys but for the most part, we’re never on the same page. It just seems like I have pretty shit luck but I think my attitude has something to do with it. I want to date someone but my body language, my little conversation, my extreme shyness just makes it seem like it’s the last thing I’m interested in. It’s really unfortunate because I get really lonely. I know I have a lot to offer and I know I can make a great girlfriend. For the longest time I’ve felt like I was never enough (pretty, outgoing, funny, smart, sexy). Now, I’m confident for the most part, but I can’t help but feel like my shyness and aversion to attention makes me not enough. It just sucks and I wish I could meet half the guys on here that sound lovely Do any of you deal with this, or have any advice? Thanks
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
I [24F] struggle with wanting to get attention from guys when I go out but also hating when I do. I’m not sure how to get past this and whether this is the problem I have dating.
| null | 0.6 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/j9i87v/i_24f_struggle_with_wanting_to_get_attention_from/
|
DistributionWise2294
|
2023-09-22 04:03:15
| 1,695,355,395 | 0 |
['swipe', 'OLD']
| 0 |
16p0hfm
| true |
Question ❓
| 1 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/16p0hfm/would_you_let_the_so_know_if_their_partner_bf/
| 1 |
I've had men in long term relationships dm me after seeing my profile from OLD. they're not the type I'd swipe on even if they were the last male on earth.their ig account shows they have SO. I let the SO know of the situation and they're appalled / shocked / humiliated their SO is on OLD behind their back hitting on other girls. the SO ask me to block their bf / husband on ig but still stay together happily which to me is a big ??? I'm starting to wonder if I should stop notifying the SO and just block these men since I'm not exactly making the world a better place by doing this. What would you do?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Would you let the SO know if their partner / bf / fiancée/ husband hyu with sexual undertones
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/16p0hfm/would_you_let_the_so_know_if_their_partner_bf/
|
Sad-Ad-5494
|
2023-12-27 21:50:59
| 1,703,713,859 | 0 |
['tinder']
| 0 |
18sc956
| true | null | 3 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/18sc956/tinder/
| 1 |
How can I make a girl like me?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Tinder
| 1 | 0.5 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/18sc956/tinder/
|
nxyera
|
2022-02-23 12:19:27
| 1,645,618,767 | null |
['tinder', 'bumble']
| 0 |
szg5u6
| true | null | 10 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/szg5u6/how_to_get_the_one/
| 2 |
I'm 24, throughout my life, I got few female friends but never got chance to have a girlfriend. I was kind of nerd, so never bothered to get one desperately, but now that I have started to earn I wonder if could be able get one. I am from India, so clearly tinder/bumble also don't work. I read on few post that try talking to some, but where I could chat with like city I am in doesn't have library, where else I can find? Also advice me that how not to end up making her just female friend.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
How to get the one
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/szg5u6/how_to_get_the_one/
|
LittleMissMillie09
|
2023-05-14 15:11:21
| 1,684,077,081 | 0 |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
13hepoo
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 14 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/13hepoo/dating_with_scars/
| 1 |
I (22F) am interested in meeting someone hopefully organically I don’t want to use dating apps or anything like that but I’m just kinda nervous about one thing. I have a lot of scars. From self harm and some from suicide attempts that are pretty obvious. Sometimes I wear clothes to cover them (and I tend to dress pretty nice and fashionable I get a lot of compliments not trying to sound cocky I promise) but I’m just worried that a.) if I don’t wear clothes to cover them no one would approach me, or b.) if I do wear clothes to cover them and I meet someone they’ll feel like idk I was lying to them or something once the scars get revealed. Does anyone have any tips or ideas for this?
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Dating with scars
| 1 | 0.57 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/13hepoo/dating_with_scars/
|
UnfairEvent3221
|
2024-04-08 15:30:12
| 1,712,590,212 | 0 |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
1bz0th7
| true | null | 6 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1bz0th7/help_my_ex_girl_26f_broke_up_with_me_28m_to_work/
| 1 |
My ex girlfriend whom I loved so much left me 3 months ago saying she needed to work on herself. Prior to that we had small argument I asked her if I can see her and resolve our differences but she refused me insisted she just wanna end the relationship over the phone. I accepted and never insist, beg or plead, I immediately cut communication and started working on myself and my future. Just a week after she broke up with me she start using dating apps which made me sad for sometime. However, she texted me today saying there’s something which belongs to me that she found in her house and she asked me if she can give me. My question is , is this her way of reaching out ? If yes, should I consider taking her back even if her previous actions affected me a lot ? Thank you so much
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Help! My ex Girl 26F broke up with me 28M to work on her self, should I take her back ?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1bz0th7/help_my_ex_girl_26f_broke_up_with_me_28m_to_work/
|
ComprehensiveCold363
|
2024-04-06 00:31:06
| 1,712,363,466 | 0 |
['matched']
| 0 |
1bwxzdq
| true | null | 10 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1bwxzdq/am_i_missing_something_women_behaving_badly_in/
| 1 |
So I recently matched with a girl on an app and seemed to be going well, I told her I was genuinely interested and we setup a physical date. Everything went ok up to the date. The day itself, she tells me the location to pick her up and I drove down, right there she stopped replying and I was just left there with my car like an idiot. I know dating is way harder for men nowadays and women have plenty of options, but that was really messed up. I’ve heard many stories from my male friends that they’re experiencing similar behaviour from women ghosting at even similar stages to what I experienced. Can someone help me understand what is going on?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Am I missing something? Women behaving badly in dating
| 1 | 0.5 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1bwxzdq/am_i_missing_something_women_behaving_badly_in/
|
Bao_Xinhua
|
2022-09-20 20:10:06
| 1,663,704,606 | null |
['swipe']
| 0 |
xjj57c
| true | null | 103 | 0 |
/r/datingoverfifty/comments/xjj57c/swipe_left_or_right/
| 17 |
On a widow (don't know for how long) who's profile picture is her and her deceased husband. Otherwise a pretty normal profile. What say ye?
|
datingoverfifty
|
t5_12ieog
|
Swipe Left or Right
| null | 0.88 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverfifty/comments/xjj57c/swipe_left_or_right/
|
henker220
|
2020-10-16 22:46:39
| 1,602,888,399 | null |
['matches', 'online dating', 'dating app', 'dating apps']
| 0 |
jcjyjf
| true |
Venting
| 4 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/jcjyjf/i_deleted_all_my_dating_apps_and_dont_really_feel/
| 0 |
I'm a 22 year old autistic male with virtually no social life. My nearest friend is an hour and a half away and always busy and I hardly get to see him often. I don't have any people-oriented hobbies. I mostly read books, watch series/YouTube, and play video games. Frankly, I'm not really interested in much else. I sure as Hell don't have any luck with women. I've never been in a relationship or even on a date. I am still grieving over a woman I met online last summer on Interpals. She was Russian-American (I have a thing for Slavic women and am a huge Russophile) and she spoke it fluently. Plus, she was really beautiful. She thought it was cool that I was into that stuff and liked my memes and sense of humor. I was very happy when we got to video chat that one time...Unfortunately, she ended up ghosting me for another man (after telling me she loved me and cared about me) and then gave me a half-assed apology and defended her actions when I confronted her months later. Before her, I was talking to a woman from England who would send me "good morning" messages and talk with me pretty much all day. She also liked my memes and my humor. Something similar happened, I fell hard for her and then she found a boyfriend in England and got too busy for me. I tried meeting women in real life when I was in high school and college and got nowhere. I had to learn the hard way that just walking up to women and trying to talk to them doesn't work and even get me accused of harassment and written up by the dean...I tried online dating and various subreddits here to find a partner but I never get any likes/messages/matches, so I decided to quit wasting my money on dating app subscriptions. Right now, I'm just trying to do things to distract from my loneliness and it's not working well. I have a feeling I'm probably not meant to have IRL friends or a partner. After my one friend finishes college in a year, I won't even have him either. Because of who I am and how boring and ugly I am, I probably won't make any more friends or find a partner. I don't have looks, money, or personality on my side so what the Hell do I do? I hate myself and I wish that I were a tall rich man with good looks and an interesting personality.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
I deleted all my dating apps and don't really feel much better. Maybe this is how it will always be
| null | 0.5 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/jcjyjf/i_deleted_all_my_dating_apps_and_dont_really_feel/
|
happyclam420
|
2018-12-01 02:46:53
| 1,543,632,413 | null |
['tinder']
| 0 |
a1z782
| true | null | 13 | 0 |
/r/AskWomen/comments/a1z782/have_you_ever_been_on_a_tinder_or_similar_date/
| 4 |
I'm just curious. How did it go? Did you know this going into the date? If not, when did you find out and what was your reaction?
|
AskWomen
|
t5_2rxrw
|
Have you ever been on a tinder (or similar) date with someone who turned out to be an alt-right extremist?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/comments/a1z782/have_you_ever_been_on_a_tinder_or_similar_date/
|
EasyRadio9005
|
2024-07-27 20:01:38
| 1,722,110,498 | 0 |
['matched', 'dating app']
| 0 |
1edp5vt
| true |
Question ❓
| 5 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/1edp5vt/i_told_a_girl_that_i_liked_her_on_the_second_date/
| 1 |
So I (23M) went on a couple dates with someone (23F) that I met on a dating app. We got along really well on the first date. We were from the same city and had similar talking styles. We also wore matching outfits which I thought was really cool. After the first date, I let her know that I had a great time and would love to see her again. We decided to meet again for a second date about 4 days later. She had mentioned that she likes red roses so I thought I’d surprise her with one on the second date. Initially, she seemed kinda spooked by it and by the end of the date it didn’t seem like that anymore. So THIS is the part I’m overthinking about. I’m generally very picky with the people I go on dates with. I would find myself eagerly waiting for her to respond to my texts after the first date. Call it infatuation, call it liking “the idea of being with her” (sadly, I’ve done this before), but this one felt different. We had a great second date and were talking for hours. So much that the place we went to was closing for the night. We ended up walking to a park and sat under a tree to talk some more. She mentioned that she wanted to take things slow (because of things that happened in her past) and I didn’t mind that. Buuuuut I slipped and said I liked her and that I’m happy to take things as slow as she’d like for it to be. I’m worried that I might have come off too strong and scared her away since it had been less than a week since we met for the first time and maybe a week and a half since we matched. Saying this out loud makes me feel guilty about “liking her” since who likes someone in less than a week anyway? We did talk about going on a third date at the end and she said yes. However, I wonder if she said that to avoid an awkward face to face situation by saying no? (I can be a pretty bad overthinker but I’m working on it)
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
I told a girl that I liked her on the second date. Now I’m worried I might have scared her away
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1edp5vt/i_told_a_girl_that_i_liked_her_on_the_second_date/
|
lonelyloser1234567
|
2017-04-30 06:34:59
| 1,493,534,099 | null |
['tinder', 'pof', 'okcupid']
| 0 |
68e5p3
| null | null | 39 | null |
/r/dating_advice/comments/68e5p3/why_are_there_so_many_unattractive_women_on/
| 0 |
I don't mean to sound shallow, but going on POF, OKCupid or Tinder feels like going into a parallel universe. 90% of women are obese, some are morbidly obese, but what strikes me most is that they have ridiculous standards. It's like a collection of the most unattractive females in one spot. I'd have to stand at walmart for a whole week to meet that many morbidly obese women. The crazy thing is that they don't even want to talk. They all seem snobby, I open up with polite messages. Some are with kids, many with much less education than me etc. What the hell? If I saw them in real life i would never even think of hitting on them, but i try talking to some online if i'm bored and they just don't seem interested in talking at all. I'm really confused. what causes their ridiculous standards? I open up with a polite hello message and something i noticed about their profile. Like in the real life, 90% of women are thin or a little overweight whereas online it's the exact opposite. Can anyone shed a light on this?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Why are there so many unattractive women on online sites?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/68e5p3/why_are_there_so_many_unattractive_women_on/
|
FlowerPhilosophy
|
2023-03-11 23:20:58
| 1,678,576,858 | null |
['hinge']
| 0 |
11oygkr
| true | null | 3 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/11oygkr/did_every_single_thing_wrong_if_anyone_wants/
| 1 |
I (f, 27) met this guy (m, 29) on hinge about a month ago (February 9th). He wasn't even my type, but there was something in his eyes -now I know it was substance abuse hehe Anyway, we just hit it off so incredibly well. Shared about our childhood trauma and how it subsequently has made relating to others difficult. Both had 8 year relationships prior. He had been single for the last 2 years. He recently quit his job to work remote and travel more --so he is currently looking for a new job. He is very passionate about his work, and talked a lot about that. We talked all night. Then it turned into all weekend. We joked about how my bio said my talents were irish exits and tangential storytelling, and he said he tends to run from love. Why did I not just end it there? Surely I should have. Sunday rolls around and after days of having a blast talking, connecting blah blah blah, he decides to bring up being a "runner" again, things must've got too close for him. Then I don't hear from him for a few days which was fine. He comes back, and we end up FaceTiming a few days later from 7pm until 2am. This is when I find out he has tried every drug under the sun except for heroin, and he even dealt some to pay for undergrad/help family back in the day but he doesn't do them or that anymore \except he smokes THC which is legal in his state\ He also lives in what he calls a "trap house" but says his lease is up in march and he's excited to get out. None of this bugged me, addiction is complicated and people are nuanced, still really liked the guy. We planned on meeting up at the end of my block (end of February) and continued to talk every single day until then. Sometimes staying up throughout the night. Snapchat, text, Twitter, sharing playlists. We have the same music taste, which really shocked me the most as music is everything to me. I sent him the Attachment quiz, and his came back as "fearful avoidant" meanwhile my attachment style was "secure" which makes sense because his mother really has put him through a lot. Anyway, everything you're not supposed to do, yeah... we did that. Last week rolls around, and we plan on me driving to his city on Friday and staying overnight --he doesn't have a car because he lives very urban and the drive was a few hours. Why would anyone PLAN their first hinge date like this? I loathe myself. I get there and end up staying all 3 days. I walk in, meet this roommate and dog. I kneel on the floor to play with the dog and find an empty bullet casing. I hand it to him and he says "what is that?" and I am like... "well it looks like a bullet casing hahaha" and he is like "I don't know how that got there" ......HAHAHAH what? fuck. very odd because both him and his roommate are very Lululemon vibes -Wearing sweaters, with their goldendoodle dog. Anyway, we drink and play darts in the living room (roommate too) and he goes "I really want you to meet John Doe (his best friend)" so then John Doe comes over. We have a blast. His best friend (who I had heard so much about already) said to me "He really likes you. He talked about you so much" The night ends around 1am we both drank a lot, and we go to the basement where he lives, and this is the first time we are like actually alone. We are laying in his bed. I am super relaxed, but he looks so nervous. I say "John Doe says you really like me" to break the ice and he smiles and we end up making out, and while we had already talked about how neither of us wanted hookups, (I had never had a hookup) but by this point we knew each other pretty well, and so we sleep together. Both nights. I gave him oral sex. He was so cuddly and sweet after too. We cuddle until around noon the next day, I mention that I might head out as I did not plan to stay longer (just to let us both have an out and reflect), but he brings up me staying for this costume party later, and so I do. We get up, walk the roommates dog around the city. Never a silent moment between us. Then get ready to go. He starts drinking again at like 2pm. We end up not even going to the costume party due to not having costumes hahaha --he said it would be weird, so he takes us out to get drinks on this rooftop bar, we stay for hours... we planned on going to a museum after but did not have time. He spent over $100 which I really wanted to split with him due to his employment situation. He refused. We get home and his friends are blowing up his phone for us to meet them out but he insists on us staying in. We listen to music in his livingroom and smoke some weed. We head downstairs when we hear his roommate + gf coming in. I find out they did a "tiny bit" of cocaine last night while we were playing darts. I was shocked. He said he did not do that anymore. I also found out he splits his prescription with roommate. His roommate and bestie are not good influences that is for sure. The next morning we wake up, and he says "we should stay in bed until 5pm" and I say I wish but I need to head out. We cuddle, he tries to do sexual stuff but I say "no no no" hahaha. He bought me my coffee and we walked around the city again before I left. He hugged me goodbye, and then he pulled me back in and kissed me goodbye. He tells me to text him when I get home. I instantly call my mom and say I had the best weekend ever. Then I get home and text him, and say "let me know if you miss me in your bed tonight" and he says "I do \kissy emoji\ babay babay" which I thought was insincere... so I just fell asleep. Then we snapped a little the next night (I snapped him first), and then I mentioned something about cuddling and he ignored that part of the message so I left the convo on read. Then the next day, I said it was a shitty day at the hospital, and he says some generic shit reply, and takes longer than usual. Then Thursday, I send him a chat at like 9pm saying "Do you not miss talking to me" and he leaves me on read for 25 min, which he has never done before. never. So then I just say "I wish you the best \heart\" and delete him because I am sorry but you can't do that to me after what we did this last weekend... what the fuck happened? now, radio silence. Was I wrong for deleting him?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Did every single thing wrong If anyone wants further proof that medical students can be dumb af (me) then please read.... also help, I am so confused and sad
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/11oygkr/did_every_single_thing_wrong_if_anyone_wants/
|
Expensive-Plan-1557
|
2021-02-04 22:33:17
| 1,612,477,997 | null |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
lcs60w
| true |
I Need Advice
| 2 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/lcs60w/afraid_that_ill_never_find_love_need_some/
| 2 |
I (25f) have only been in one relationship that lasted 7 months and didn’t have my first boyfriend till I was 24. I’ve had things with guys here and there before then but they never progressed into a serious relationship. My ex dumped me and I was devastated bc I really loved him so much and it took me forever to finally find love. I am a bit picky but definitely not too picky. I have been single for 8 months now and no luck at alll. I’m on 3 dating apps and I try my best to put myself out there but anytime I go on a date with a guy he just wants to bang or I don’t feel enough chemistry w him so I decide to keep looking. I really don’t want to settle for someone I’m not really into. I know that I am above average attractive, nice, cool, and normal but for some reason the odds are not in my favor and it seems like a never ending cycle of me searching for real love. I want to find the one but it seems nearly impossible. I’m terrified of ending up alone
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Afraid that I’ll never find love. Need some reassurance
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/lcs60w/afraid_that_ill_never_find_love_need_some/
|
J_5401
|
2020-10-28 20:24:45
| 1,603,916,685 | null |
['matched', 'swipe', 'dating app', 'tinder']
| 0 |
jjvm8i
| true | null | 7 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/jjvm8i/accidentally_matched_with_her_friend_on_a_dating/
| 3 |
I (20m) have been talking to/seeing this girl (20f) for a couple weeks now. Things have been going pretty great, and this past week I met her friends, roommates, hung out with them all, and it went very well. Suddenly, the girl seemed to either completely lose interest in me or be mad at me. I haven't asked her why that was, figured maybe she has just been in a bad mood or something. While racking my brain on what I possibly could have done wrong, I figured out what it was. Since we weren't necessarily dating yet, but things were kind of progressing that way, I hadn't been using my tinder profile, but it was still active. I just realized that I matched with a friend of hers on Tinder a few days ago, and am 99.9% sure that's why she's mad at me. I totally understand why that would make her upset, but I literally hadn't been on tinder in weeks. I must've gotten the match from a swipe I made a while back. I feel like an asshole for not deactivating my profile, because I actually do want to be with her. Now I'm kinda in a weird spot where I don't know whether to bring it up and apologize, or hope it kind of goes away on it's own.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Accidentally matched with her friend on a dating app
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/jjvm8i/accidentally_matched_with_her_friend_on_a_dating/
|
Foreign_Safety2712
|
2022-10-06 01:14:32
| 1,665,018,872 | null | null | 0 |
xws4r7
| true | null | 18 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/xws4r7/the_once_a_day_responders_boundaries_or_not_that/
| 10 |
I get it. At my age people are busy and arent going to hover over their phone. Also, its good to have boundaries with online dating. I do however find it difficult to feel like there is any motion at all with a once a day message. And usually if its once a day its like at 10pm right before they go to bed. I have had a higher number of this recently and get a bit frustrated. I dont make myself available at all times either, but when I am interested in someone I do like to exchange more then just one text a day. Feels like no momentum for me to ask them out. Makes me feel like I am 10 guys she is talking to and low on the interest. Like just texting to keep me there. Which I know may not be fair for every situation. I am not a phone addict or anything. I just usually feel like there isnt much interest to meetup when slower communication. Am I wrong? What do you all think?
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
The once a day responders. Boundaries or not that interested? 29m
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/xws4r7/the_once_a_day_responders_boundaries_or_not_that/
|
Cryingsstar
|
2024-03-14 17:03:06
| 1,710,435,786 | 0 |
['matched', 'dating app']
| 0 |
1beq4fd
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1beq4fd/was_i_love_bombed/
| 1 |
I (21F) have started talking to this guy(24M) that I matched with on a dating app, in the 2 weeks that we have started texting back and forth we went on 3 dates and the 3rd we made out in his car. Later that night he texts me telling me how great I am, that our date went really well etc. he would always text good morning text or goodnight texts, telling me he likes me but since the beginning he has told me that he just got out of a toxic relationship and isn’t ready to date and I told him I understand we can slowly get to know each other and he agreed. Fast forward to yesterday I’ve noticed that his vibes are totally different as in he isn’t as active as before, his texts are slowly becoming more dryer and shorter. And when I mentioned if he’s seeing/ talking to other girls he starts denying that he isn’t. I just find it strange why he would suddenly do a 180 on me
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Was I love bombed?!?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1beq4fd/was_i_love_bombed/
|
CrazyUncleDino
|
2023-05-16 15:52:12
| 1,684,252,332 | 0 |
['matched', 'OLD']
| 0 |
13j8zzl
| true | null | 53 | 0 |
/r/datingoverfifty/comments/13j8zzl/too_much_texting_or_calling/
| 16 |
It is the age old issue with OLD, how much do you text or call a person you've connected with? I (DWM 60) matched with a woman (DWF 59) recently and we traded texts all morning on Sunday. Based on our bios & photos we have a lot in common, live about an hour apart, and are both teachers. At the end of my fifth message, I wrote, "When you're comfortable I'd enjoy talking on the phone with you later today. I'm happy to provide my last name and phone number. Feel free to Google me. I'm real, not a married catfisher, just a nice normal guy seeking a LTR." She took me up on my offer, so I sent my personal info. We ended up talking Sunday night for 70 minutes. Our conversation flowed easily as we talked about our lives, kids, marriages & divorces, interests, and activities. As we ended the call I expressed what a great conversation we had and that I looked forward to learning more about her and her life. She texted 15 minutes later saying what a nice time she had talking with me. I replied back about how our conversation flowed naturally. On Monday we traded several messages but did not talk as she had a busy day. In my last text of the night, I expressed that I'd like to meet for dinner sometime later this week, depending upon her schedule. She did not reply, but she had told me she was going to bed. Q: How much should I be texting and calling her? I don't want to be a bother during the workday, but I don't want to go totally silent. I want to express my interest and lock down a dinner date this week. TYIA.
|
datingoverfifty
|
t5_12ieog
|
Too Much Texting or Calling?
| 16 | 0.87 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverfifty/comments/13j8zzl/too_much_texting_or_calling/
|
Tim-Man
|
2023-08-28 13:16:07
| 1,693,228,567 | 0 |
['OLD']
| 0 |
163luib
| true | null | 16 | 0 |
/r/datingoverfifty/comments/163luib/old_alternatives_and_perspective/
| 1 |
Article from Psychology Today points out the ubiquity of OLD as well as alternatives as people tire from the apps not meeting their needs. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/dating-in-the-digital-age/202308/how-to-date-without-an-app
|
datingoverfifty
|
t5_12ieog
|
OLD Alternatives and Perspective
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverfifty/comments/163luib/old_alternatives_and_perspective/
|
Throwawa9380
|
2024-02-18 14:33:36
| 1,708,266,816 | 0 |
['matches', 'online dating', 'dating apps', 'bumble']
| 0 |
1atvehk
| true |
Support Needed 🫂
| 2 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/1atvehk/i_am_scared_of_datingmarriage/
| 3 |
I am scared about prospect of marriage. Hi I am 26M, indian. I am 5ft 8in, so not exactly short. But I have a medium/exotic skin complexion. Now I have tried dating but couldn't date anyone. Either the timing was wrong, they were already committed or due to their personal preferences. I have tried online dating apps such as Bumble but couldn't get any matches. I talked to people/friends who rejected me and it was strange to know I was getting rejected because of my skin colour and height which I totally have no control of. Another weird reason for which I got rejected was because I have not had sex yet😅. Now I stopped looking for people after 24. I don't party I don't smoke or drink. Meanwhile my friends are getting into relationship and doing hookups and what not. I feel like I have missed a lot in life. I have never been in a relationship and really depressed lately because of this. Parents have no idea how bad this hookup culture is nowadays. Not to generalize but I feel women keep AM as their last option. After 2 or 3 relationship they start looking for AM. Women(again not all) have no idea how hard it is to date men, they act surprised when I tell them I haven't been in a relationship. I don't want to be anyone's last option. It really sucks and hurts. No idea what to do. Please help. I am just thinking relationship/marriages is just not my cup of tea. PS: AM=arranged marriage
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
I am scared of dating/marriage
| 3 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/1atvehk/i_am_scared_of_datingmarriage/
|
treelightways
|
2022-07-20 00:13:33
| 1,658,276,013 | null |
['bumble']
| 0 |
w37u4k
| true | null | 167 | 0 |
/r/datingoverforty/comments/w37u4k/feeling_rejected_would_love_some_reassurance_and/
| 36 |
I'm feeling a little rejected and embarrassingly it's not that common for me to get rejected on dates so am needing to process a little so I can grow this muscle, and could use some different perspectives - shared in kindness. (I see people can be brutal with each other here, and I'm also feeling super tender dealing with a big loss that just occurred.) I (40F) went on a date with a guy (50M) on Sunday from Bumble. It was a meh date, and I realize looking back it was a really weird dynamic between us. He is really good at getting people to open up (it didn't feel like him being warm and compassionate, but felt like some weird power thing he does, that I fell into - he told me about how he tried to seduce his therapist, say things purposefully to turn her on, and it seemed clear it was about power and control, so among other things, it was clear to me he likes to have power over and be invulnerable himself), so I was way more vulnerable than I wanted to be with him, but in this weird inauthentic way. So I'm feeling uncomfortable that I gave any of that to him, and just feels doubly rejecting and icky. Anyway, he ends the date abruptly right after an intimate conversational exchange, just saying "I have to get going, I have to get up at 5 for a big case". The abruptness didn't feel good. He walks me to my car, gives me a cold half hug, texts me as he is walking away, "Thanks for meeting with me I love your smile." We both have a 30 minute drive to get home, and so I was going to wait to text back later that evening. He texts 30 minutes later. "Home. Thank you again" To which I reply. "Thanks, that's nice of you to say. It was good meeting and crossing paths..glad you're home safe, have a good night 🌙 ." I figured that was the end of it, and I was right - which after processing the uncomfortable dynamics going on between us and that he pulled out in me, I was okay with and not feeling bad about it. But then I was thinking I should unmatch him at some point from Bumble, but didn't want to be rude and do it right away - it wasn't a horrible date, just nothing there really. And then today he unmatched me, and suddenly I felt rejected.. Because in my mind, you don't unmatch two days later unless it was like a horrible date or you hated the person - which I know other people have different views, too. But I never had a guy unmatch right after a date either - if it wasn't going anywhere, it might be even a few weeks before one of us unmatched. But it felt like a slap in the face. Like he thought I was that bad that he had to unmatch right away? Again, dealing with a big loss so just feeling down generally and this just made me feel worse and trying really hard to not beat myself up, especially because of how weird of a power dynamic it was during the date, and me wishing I had been more true to myself and not opened up to him. I know I'll be over it by tomorrow (or at least Thursday, haha), but right now it sucks and could use some reassuring thoughts or commiseration, or wider/bigger perspectives than the one I'm in. Also, any other possible reasons someone unmatches you that quickly, lol? (---asks the young insecure part of me. haha) Thank you kindly 3 Edit: As with most things, there is usually more to it than meets the eye So I'd like to clarify: His many attempts at manipulations during the night caught me in a momentary web. And although I rejected them and didn't play along, it still left me feeling confused. It also elicited in me an old wound, the desire to have him "approve" of me. Not because I liked him (I didn't like much about him at all) - but because he was cold and withholding, as well as intimidating in his worldly endeavors (semi-famous, wildly successful and genius level creative) and reminded me of a family member who was similar and never gave me their approval. So it wasn't of course just about the unmatching ;)
|
datingoverforty
|
t5_su6ij
|
Feeling Rejected - would love some reassurance and perspective 3
| null | 0.79 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverforty/comments/w37u4k/feeling_rejected_would_love_some_reassurance_and/
|
imjusttrying25
|
2023-07-07 20:24:02
| 1,688,761,442 | 0 |
['hinge']
| 0 |
14tibpl
| false | null | 7 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/14tibpl/need_advice_on_handling_a_persistent_guy_from/
| 1 |
I really need advice, as I'm not sure what the right thing to do is. (It's a bit long but please bear with me) I, 28F, just moved to a new city in early late January for a job in a city I knew absolutely no one. I got on Hinge and met this guy 27M as one of my first dates here. He is of Indian origin and worked at my company too. Our date was normal, he had a very friendly vibe, we had Thai food, then went to a park and I went home. I didn't think he was amazing, and good company. And it was one of the very few human interactions I had outside of work.Since then, he texts me almost everyday. I was a new driver at the time so took the bus to work. He offered to pick and drop me from work, and told me he does carpool with a few people. Yet everytime I accepted his offer to pick and drop me, there was no one else in the car. They had some excuse or the other. And he would always insist to go for food as well. Every weekend, he would ask me what I wanted to do. I would tell him that I wanted to explore some part of the city, he would pick and drop me, insists to pay for food etc. But the vibes were ALWAYS very friendly. He never even touched my hand or stood too close, and we hung out maybe 14-15 times. I was also going out on other dates, and we never even mentioned anything remotely scandalous or romantic, so I had considered him a friend perhaps? Anyway, everytime I do agree to hang out with him now, he ALWAYS tries to extend it somehow. He says you have to see this park. And then that place ends up being atleast 40 minutes away. Me being introverted but too shy to say no, I go along with it but always feel drained after hanging out with him.For a few weeks in the middle, i always made one excuse or the other to not meet him, and told him I had a few trips planned. And that point, he just offered to pick me and drop me off at the airport since that was the only way we could spend time. For weeks, he texts everyday, I respond each text after 3-4 days and he DOES NOT get the hint.Two weeks ago, he says he's throwing a birthday dinner, and I thought it would be too rude to not go. So i agreed. He insisted that he pick me up and drop me off from his birthday by sayin i won't find parking where we're going (whereas all his other friends found parking just fine). While he was dropping me off, I casually said that I have a boyfriend now. He was completely quiet rest of the ride, didn't say anything. Then a few days later texted that we should hang out without other people once. Then i said i'm busy that weekend with chores, and he responds he'd like to accompany me to my grocery run. I'm honestly getting kinda scared. I don''t know if I should be. But I really don't know what to do. There's obviously no vibes, we never call our hangouts a date. They really aren't, but we did meet on hinge? I'm fraid i've gotten him too involved. But I just don't know how to get rid of him without hurting his ego. Please, any advice would help. Thank you.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Need advice on handling a persistent guy from work, getting uncomfortable. What should I do?
| 1 | 0.5 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/14tibpl/need_advice_on_handling_a_persistent_guy_from/
|
dumbspringa
|
2015-10-16 19:07:24
| 1,445,022,444 | 0 |
['online dating']
| 0 |
3p0xe2
| null | null | 21 | null |
/r/AskWomen/comments/3p0xe2/in_online_dating_do_the_use_of_emoticons_im_not/
| 0 |
As a newly single male in early thirties navigating the minefield that is online dating (after a loong gap), I would like women's perspective on few questions I have: I tend to joke around a lot in my messages. So, I almost always end with a :), lest it should offend the recepient (nothing controversial, I steer clear of them. just a little ribbing). Do ladies think it is bad? Would you rather prefer 'j/k'? Is this off-putting (like I hate txt speak or wEiRd CaPiTaLiZaTiOn in msgs)? Or should I avoid all this garnish, and hope it weeds out the easily offended and those who don't get my jokes? "If you can't handle me at my worst ..." :)
|
AskWomen
|
t5_2rxrw
|
In (online) dating, do the use of emoticons (I'm not even talking about emojis) in messages put you off of a potential suitor?
| 0 | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/comments/3p0xe2/in_online_dating_do_the_use_of_emoticons_im_not/
|
Zealousideal-Lab-281
|
2023-08-02 15:08:32
| 1,690,988,912 | 0 |
['hinge']
| 0 |
15gbe77
| false | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/15gbe77/going_on_a_first_date_and_nervous/
| 1 |
I (21f) haven’t been on a first date in quite a whileee. tomorrow I’m getting sushi with this guy I met off hinge. I guess I’m always worried that it’s gonna get like awkward or quite or I’m not gonna know what to say hahaha. idk I always have so much anxiety around these things.😅 what kind of topics do you guys bring up when it gets like that to keep the conversation going?? or really any dating advice I don’t have a lot of experience lolll. if it helps this isn’t a date to look for a LTP more just like fwb vibes. thanks((:
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
going on a first date and nervous
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/15gbe77/going_on_a_first_date_and_nervous/
|
frogmicky
|
2019-06-20 23:09:24
| 1,561,072,164 | null | null | 0 |
c32uv7
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/c32uv7/she_liked_my_pic_but/
| 1 |
We've had a short conversation today my messages are thought provoking I think and hers are short. As he doesn't answer my questions and there are long gaps in 5he conversation like an hour or so. Should I un-match her or keep trying.
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
She liked my pic but......
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/c32uv7/she_liked_my_pic_but/
|
chimperchimp
|
2019-09-04 23:40:26
| 1,567,640,426 | null |
['hinge']
| 0 |
czss8k
| true | null | 9 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/czss8k/a_one_night_stand_lied_to_me_about_his_age/
| 1 |
Tdlr: guy said he was 32, was actually 42. Feel tricked, naive, and lied to. Keeping it simple, i was in a friends with benefits situation for an year and a half with someone I really liked. I proposed a relationship, he didn't want it. For 2 months i mulled over him, it was super distracting and realized I needed to do something to get him out of my head. There was this guy on Hinge who claimed to be 7 years older than me [25F/32M]. We grabbed drinks, hit it off, and went to his place to end the night. He was great, except for trying to insist we don't use protection, which was a major turn off. Always fast forward 4 days, and I thought it would be fun to look him up because he has a good job and what not (a physician) and based the graduation dates he has on his physician practice profile, he is definitely at least 16 years older than me [42]. Unless there is an absurd way to explain the graduation dates, his age did not add up. Anyways, it was a one night stand so good riddance but I can't believe I trusted him. I question what else he could have lied about (i.e. being clean, past relationships, his interests, etc). I also felt very attracted to him and his conversational style which made me trust him instantly. I just compare this feeling to all the other honest guys who may have been more awkward on dates or less conversational savy. My first reaction to him was wow he is older than the guys I usually date (I usually don't go above 27) but I let it slide because his profile didn't claim to be 10+years older. Any advice to on being rationale on dates and not quickly being trusting? My FWB could be described as a younger version of this guy, and I'm afraid I'm attracted to assholes. Anyways I feel over my FWB finally. At least some good came out of it EDIT: yes, it was protected!
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
A one night stand lied to me about his age, questioning my judgement.
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/czss8k/a_one_night_stand_lied_to_me_about_his_age/
|
Kind-Fan-5293
|
2024-05-15 07:03:29
| 1,715,756,609 | 0 |
['dating apps']
| 0 |
1cseph6
| true | null | 5 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1cseph6/is_your_partner_being_active_on_dating_apps_while/
| 1 |
If you found your partner was actively checking dating apps despite being in an exclusive and committed relationship, would you take that as a sign that the relationship is not going to last?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Is your partner being active on dating apps while in an exclusive relationship a sign that the relationship is not going to last?
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1cseph6/is_your_partner_being_active_on_dating_apps_while/
|
ipattz
|
2017-05-19 07:01:17
| 1,495,177,277 | null |
['tinder']
| 0 |
6c236f
| null | null | 2 | null |
/r/dating_advice/comments/6c236f/how_do_you_convince_yourself_that_its_okay_if_a/
| 2 |
Alright so fair warning, I'm an over thinker and stress myself out way too easily but bare with me. I have a date with a guy tomorrow and as cute as he is, I have this gut feeling that maybe he just wants to be friends or he's lost interest. It's really stupid but like the "tone" of the texting seems different? But I know, it's texting so how can you differentiate tone. Anyway, Me being who I am, I always like to think about the worst case scenario so that I'm prepared to handle it in the present moment and so for this scenario, worst case is he has decided that he just wants to be friends. My question is, what advice can you give me to just make sure that I can handle the whole "let's be friends" I'm not saying I wouldn't want a friendship but I haven't been friends with any of my tinder dates because well I'm there to date... granted we haven't discussed what we want from this which could be for tomorrow but still.. I like to be prepared. I'm neurotic and a huge over thinker but just help me out if possible please. THANKS :)
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
How do you convince yourself that it's okay if a date doesn't develop further?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/6c236f/how_do_you_convince_yourself_that_its_okay_if_a/
|
nicholas_1227
|
2023-09-18 06:53:54
| 1,695,020,034 | 0 |
['dating apps', 'hinge']
| 0 |
16lo95z
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 1 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/16lo95z/slow_burn_but_hes_moving_away/
| 1 |
So I have been in my healing single phase for 8 months or so, but decided to jump on hinge out of shear curiosity (I was always back and forth about it bc meh dating apps) and just started joking with someone on there that actually could carry a convo with me and have fun, we text for a few weeks because I was on vacation but when I came back we went on a date and it was amazing. Literally compatible that we are goof balls, sexual chemistry, and we know how to have mature conversations too. I know this because we have gone on about 7 dates now, slow burn dating which is all so new to me. He’s mature, treats me all the time, and is respectful that I don’t want to have sex right away. Everything I didn’t know I was looking for. It certainly felt too good to be true….. and then I find out he is moving in February to a different state. We have talked about this factor a lot and what to do about it… He tells me that he thinks I’m “the one” and wants to build a future with me, all things he says he has never taken seriously before, which is great and romantic but I told him I want to see actions and be logical about it at the same time and he respects that. I told him I don’t want to be love bombed and he agreed and wants to show me. Is this a joke???? It’s a crazy concept to me for a man to be so kind. I really do feel like I met my future husband but I have been extremely anxious and triggered having avoidant attachment issues and just really scared of the future because I’m not used to good things happening to me.. I try to just be in the moment with him, and when I am I am extremely happy, but I feel like I am constantly in my head and worried when I’m trying to just be okay to not know the future. Apart of me wants to cut it off because I am scared but also I would rather experience this and learn for what I can at the same time. I have been learning how to continue to heal, have my own time and space, and have a secure dynamic with someone else. So that has to be for something I guess.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Slow burn but he’s moving away
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/16lo95z/slow_burn_but_hes_moving_away/
|
Blaze_556
|
2022-09-24 23:07:13
| 1,664,060,833 | null |
['matches']
| 0 |
xn6vv7
| true | null | 22 | 0 |
/r/datingoverforty/comments/xn6vv7/did_something_on_the_apps_change/
| 6 |
I deleted my apps earlier this year due to reasons. I downloaded them a few weeks ago. Using the same pics and same info from before but it’s damn near dead now. I used to be able to get matches here and there. I haven’t had a single one since I got the apps up and going again. Probably my sign to delete again
|
datingoverforty
|
t5_su6ij
|
Did something on the app’s change?
| null | 0.71 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/datingoverforty/comments/xn6vv7/did_something_on_the_apps_change/
|
littleboopeep
|
2020-10-24 01:41:52
| 1,603,503,712 | null | null | 0 |
jh0ec1
| true | null | 13 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/jh0ec1/is_long_distance_relationship_work_this_time/
| 1 |
This year is a crazy year. Since everyone says is a new norm doing online. Is meeting someone online possible even you're thousand miles away?
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
Is Long Distance Relationship work this time?
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/jh0ec1/is_long_distance_relationship_work_this_time/
|
ashesandsparkles
|
2024-06-30 00:55:20
| 1,719,708,920 | 0 | null | 0 |
1drpogx
| true | null | 154 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/1drpogx/what_are_ridiculous_things_men_deal_with_on_old/
| 38 |
As I female, I’m aware of all the crap we have go through. I’m interested to know if it’s the same for men?
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
What are ridiculous things men deal with on OLD?
| 38 | 0.82 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/1drpogx/what_are_ridiculous_things_men_deal_with_on_old/
|
MissingDumpling
|
2024-03-17 17:28:01
| 1,710,696,481 | 0 |
['matched']
| 0 |
1bh36k9
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1bh36k9/he_is_turning_cold_confused/
| 1 |
I matched with a guy from different city (F25, M30). We hit it off from the very 1st message, then he started calling me frequently before a trip he planned to my city. Calls were awesome, hours flying, same sense of humour, he admitted himself he gets along with me so well that it rarely happens. He gave me a lot of sweet compliments. We also started to flirt. When he arrived in my city, I received a gift he promised. We had deep talks, vibed on emotional level, agreed on important values. He initiated a physical contact too. Holding my hands, making out, spent a night together cuddling and he respected my will of not wanting to go all the way in. Then we said goodbye, he said that it's so easy for him to come to my city and "see you next time". And after that weekend he's been acting quite distant this whole week. Replying to me less frequently, he doesn't call anymore or flirt. I don't know what's going on... this time I really felt there's a mutual connection and attraction, can't deny it. I guess I should try to ask him about it and move on eventually?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
He is turning cold? Confused
| 1 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1bh36k9/he_is_turning_cold_confused/
|
TeslaCoil77
|
2020-09-16 00:07:14
| 1,600,214,834 | null | null | 0 |
itkrsp
| true | null | 1 | 0 |
/r/OnlineDating/comments/itkrsp/one_old_okc_dating_strategy_ive_devised/
| 0 |
So, I've had really good luck with OkC one of the ONLY modern dating sites I've gotten dates and even relationships off of, during COVID I've noticed a TON of inactive profiles. Respectively so. I've since devised a plan, if I like them keep them in my likes until I see them log on at least once then I'll send a intro. Are their any other COVID strategies you use for at least getting a date?
|
OnlineDating
|
t5_2qpe9
|
One OLD (OkC) dating strategy I've devised..
| null | 0.29 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/itkrsp/one_old_okc_dating_strategy_ive_devised/
|
Justanothergirl82
|
2019-06-30 04:02:11
| 1,561,867,331 | null |
['dating site']
| 0 |
c78t2v
| true | null | 7 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/c78t2v/love_gone_bad/
| 3 |
Hi guys! Im really going through a difficult time. I dont normally discuss my private life but I feel like this is a safe place to do so. Yesterday I decided to break things off with my fiance. The problem is, although he says he loves me, he despises my 13 year old son and frequently says derogatory things about him. My son has Asperger's and he has mocked him because of it. He says he hates the way he eats, has called him stupid, lazy and the list goes on. last night I noticed that he had turned a photo of my son face down so I turned it back over, today it is gone. We are (were), an interracial couple and once when we were arguing he called me racial slurs. He apologized, but I honestly I havent been able to get over it. Immediately after we broke up yesterday, (maybe 10 minutes later) he changed his relationship status and restarted all of his dating site accounts and has been reaching out to tons of women. I havent moved out yet of course, so it is all very up close and personal. Thankfully, my son and daughter are out of state for the summer so they dont have to witness the dissolution. I feel completely shattered however, and so depressed. I had no choice but to break things off but I am miserable. I feel guilty for staying as long as I did and I feel guilty for being so sad that it is ending. Im 37 and have never been married and I though I had finally found my person. How could things have gone so wrong? I am devastated.
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Love gone bad...
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/c78t2v/love_gone_bad/
|
PureInternet8317
|
2024-01-11 11:52:38
| 1,704,973,958 | 0 |
['matches', 'dating apps']
| 0 |
193zxzy
| true |
Question ❓
| 87 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/193zxzy/how_to_stop_feeling_like_a_loser_for_not_being/
| 30 |
I tried delving into the world of hookups, was promptly asked to leave. 0 likes or matches on dating apps, not one look in my direction in clubs and bars. I realize that woman only want the hotties for hookups so my experience is not that uncommon, but I still feel like shit because my male friends have FWBs, ONSs, and stuff.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
How to stop feeling like a loser for not being able to find casual sex partners?
| 30 | 0.69 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/193zxzy/how_to_stop_feeling_like_a_loser_for_not_being/
|
Wing_walker
|
2013-09-26 17:15:19
| 1,380,215,719 | 0 |
['online dating', 'okcupid']
| 0 |
1n6s98
| null | null | 6 | null |
/r/dating_advice/comments/1n6s98/dating_when_youre_60/
| 1 |
Hi all, I just needed some advice. My mother is 61 this year and finally looking for love. My dad walked out on her to marry 17 year old stripper in the Philippines 22 years ago, and let her with 4 kids to raise. She never dated anyone, and just concentrated on us. Sorry about the sob story, I just wanted everyone to know why this is so difficult. Does anyone have any tips on how she can meet singles her age? Are men her age looking for long term love nowadays?? I'm 29 and married so I have no idea what that mind frame would be like. I made her a profile on okcupid but it's not going too well, and I think she gets really sad when I tell her she has no messages. When I was online dating I would get many messages a day, and maybe this makes her feel like she's not good enough. We live in Windsor, Ontario so maybe that's the issue? Anyways, any ideas, tips or advice I can get on how to get my mother back in the dating game and help her find a man who will complete her and make her happy. She's never been in love (her marriage was arranged) so it would be so nice for her to taste that even if it's this late in the game. Thanks
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Dating when you're 60+
| 1 | null |
http://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/1n6s98/dating_when_youre_60/
|
spookyghost123456
|
2020-06-21 04:23:58
| 1,592,713,438 | null |
['hinge']
| 0 |
hd0mfr
| true | null | 5 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/hd0mfr/is_it_ghosting_if_i_dont_respond_to_a_guy_that/
| 3 |
Basically, I met a guy on Hinge, we started talking over Snapchat, and he ghosted me after we made plans for a second date. After a week of no contact I blocked him and the next day he messaged me on my Hinge profile saying “Hey how are you?”. Is it ghosting to not respond?
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
Is it ghosting if I don’t respond to a guy that reached out after he ghosted me?
| null | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/hd0mfr/is_it_ghosting_if_i_dont_respond_to_a_guy_that/
|
buku-o-rama
|
2023-04-27 16:27:39
| 1,682,612,859 | 0 |
['bumble']
| 0 |
130ucxe
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 4 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/130ucxe/we_ended_on_an_awkward_note_and_now_shes_joined_a/
| 2 |
I went out on a date with this woman from Bumble back in December. She expressed strong interest in meeting up again. I wasn't super interested but she was nice and I figured I'll see what happens. Then a few days later she sent me a strange message saying she's not gonna be using the app and she'll probably be back in January so Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. I had given her my number before but she ignored it and kept messaging on the app. Then one night in February she messaged me out of the blue saying she was afraid I would have found someone else by now and expressed interest in meeting up again. We made a plan for the next day. She also asked me to add her on a messaging platform she uses and we started chatting on there. Then the next morning she messaged me saying she has to cancel because of her daughter's recital or something. I said no problem we can set something up another time. Then a few hours later she messaged me saying she was going to disappear for a month and to not worry about her. I said ok no worries hope everything is ok. Then about a month later, I randomly checked the messaging platform and noticed she was gone, meaning she had either deleted me or was using a burner account which she deleted. I also noticed she was still using Bumble because her distance was being displayed. I went ahead and unmatched her because I don't appreciate someone thinking they can string me along while they pursue better options or whatever and think I'm just gonna wait around for them. Fast forward a couple months. Now I notice she has joined Meetup and a couple of the Meetup groups I am in. I am sort of dreading running into her at event because I don't really know how I'm supposed to approach her. Should I acknowldge her? Should I address how I unmatched her? Should I acknowledge in front of others that we met on Bumble? The only other time I've run into a dating match in real life it's been someone I was still on good terms with.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
We ended on an awkward note and now she's joined a Meetup group I'm in, how do I act if we run into each other?
| 2 | 1 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/130ucxe/we_ended_on_an_awkward_note_and_now_shes_joined_a/
|
blueberries498
|
2021-07-15 21:47:40
| 1,626,385,660 | null |
['matched', 'tinder']
| 0 |
ol2rh9
| true |
Venting
| 8 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/ol2rh9/just_another_ghost_tale_is_there_hope/
| 1 |
I’ve (28F) been on two dates with this guy I met on tinder (28M) and they have been wonderful. We vibed, there was chemistry, great conversations, shared values etc. We did hook up on the second date. I don’t usually sleep with guys that early on but the moment felt right with him so I went for it. Now, we have been texting here and there since our last date. He mentioned in person and via text that he would like to hang out again on the weekend. Then all of a sudden, he stopped replying to my messages. It’s been a day, which is not super long but I am getting the feeling that he may be ghosting me. We are still matched on tinder and I can see that he’s been active. That’s completely fine seeing as we only went on two dates - we’re not exclusive. It’s just kinda upsetting. Idk what went wrong. Idk what to do. I really liked this guy. At the end of the day, I understand that if he’s not interested then he’s not interested. Move on. But right now, it just sucks. Especially since we slept together and now he’s gone radio silent.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Just another ghost tale - is there hope?
| null | 0.6 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/ol2rh9/just_another_ghost_tale_is_there_hope/
|
Pale-Alfalfa-2432
|
2023-11-21 05:09:39
| 1,700,543,379 | 0 |
['matched', 'dating apps']
| 0 |
180992g
| true |
I Need Advice 😩
| 12 | 0 |
/r/dating/comments/180992g/women_arent_attracted_to_me/
| 3 |
I’m 19(F) and i am bisexual. but i am definitely more attracted to women than men. i’ve been in the dating world for a little over a year. but i have never gone out with a woman. even for a little bit i made it so my dating apps only showed me women. i wanna say i had it set like that for 2 or 3 months. and i had only matched with one girl. we texted for a few days but nothing happened. she just kinda ghosted me. i feel like my body type is the main factor. i’m a little chubby and have a pretty big butt. and i feel like only men like that? i don’t know. it just feels like women just don’t like me like that. and i really would like to at least experience something romantic with a woman once in my life. especially since i’m mostly attracted to them. i just haven’t had the best experiences with men so i really would like something different.
|
dating
|
t5_2qhb1
|
Women aren’t attracted to me?
| 3 | 0.71 |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/comments/180992g/women_arent_attracted_to_me/
|
distresseddream
|
2018-03-21 05:21:42
| 1,521,609,702 | null |
['online dating', 'dating sites']
| 0 |
85zows
| false | null | 9 | 0 |
/r/dating_advice/comments/85zows/28_and_barely_had_a_date_how_can_i_fix_this/
| 9 |
I have a really hard time talking with girls I am attracted to. Like if I find a girl attractive I will actively avoid her . Not because she did anything wrong but because I am scared of her . I don't know how to stop getting in my own way . I also seem to be really adverse to saying hi to people and saying there names for the frist time . Last year I finally found out what my problem was. I have anxiety. I can't seem to approach women in real life . Flirting seems like foreign concept to me . All the women my age seem to be well vested about the ins and outs of dating . It seems like as I am finally getting started dating all the women in my age group are settling down . They are looking for husband material and judging by my results I am not that . I have tried online dating sites and I did get lucky and had a girlfriend for a while . She dumped me and now I am trying it again . It seems like no matter what I say whenever I send a message no one ever seems to ever respond . I just feel like I'm missing something .
|
dating_advice
|
t5_2s4kl
|
28 and barely had a date . How can I fix this?
| null | null |
https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/85zows/28_and_barely_had_a_date_how_can_i_fix_this/
|
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